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Spectacular trolling or just every band I ever run into? Modular Synthesizers
Old 10th March 2014
  #1
Spectacular trolling or just every band I ever run into?

Check out this little slice of heaven..

http://columbus.***************/muc/4362781961.html


Ill copy the text before it gets deleted
Old 10th March 2014
  #2
"Posted: 4 days ago
Band Looking for Studio to record us for free (Columbus Area)


© craigslist

We are a great rock band playing out regularly and are looking for a recording studio will to record us for free. This is a project that we will be making and selling CDs when we are done. we are also planning on selling online with iTunes etc. We would also be willing to advertise your studio for a reasonable fee as well. Our music is very poplar so we know it would help you. Our project could put you on the map.

Your studio has to be able to record live drums and amps. We would also look for you to be well equipped with good quality equipment like a few expensive mics. We want to sing into a Newman Mic if possible.

We are also trying to get a music video for one of the songs so we can post it on UTube.

We've got something like 12 songs so we won't need a lot of recording time. Most of the songs are around 4 minutes long so we can probably get them done in about an hour or so. Plus maybe an hour or so to mix. So I guess 3 hours will cover it.

When we go platinum you'll be happy you recorded us for free."


I'd think it's a joke from a pissed off studio owner, but really I've had all those things requested of me at one time or another.
Old 10th March 2014
  #3
This could work out well under the right circumstances.
Old 10th March 2014
  #4
Lives for gear
 
noiseflaw's Avatar
 

It could work out catastrophically under the wrong circumstances.
Old 10th March 2014
  #5
Gear Guru
 
kafka's Avatar
BTW, we call ourselves "Van Halen".
Old 11th March 2014
  #6
Lives for gear
 

Three hours at $ 200 an hour, that is $ 600, plus mixing $ 600 that is $ 1200.- Any incredibly talented band gigging regularly can EASILY afford that. Are you saying you are not that talented? Or do you think you cannot do it in 3 hours? Oh my...
Old 11th March 2014
  #7
Lives for gear
 

Looks like a peed off studio owner being a bit sarcastic.

Sad thing is most bands won't figure that out and will probably think that is the new way to get studio time.
Old 11th March 2014
  #8
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DigitMus's Avatar
 

That sounds like just about every cold call I got at my studio in the late 80s-early90s. Except for the ones that also wanted to know "How much will you pay me to record and how many records do I get?"
Old 11th March 2014
  #9
Gear Addict
 
ignorantape's Avatar
 

Our music is very 'poplar'

Are they a tree?
Old 11th March 2014
  #10
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badmark's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by ignorantape View Post
Our music is very 'poplar'

Are they a tree?
I heard the drummer is a bit wooden.
Old 11th March 2014
  #11
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noiseflaw's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by badmark View Post
I heard the drummer is a bit wooden.
...and the singer can only bark.

Old 11th March 2014
  #12
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frans's Avatar
If a few of us in the area team up we could have fun. It goes like this: invite them, play along, set up, let them play, send them home. Delete session. Write them a few lines why you effed with them.
Next studio, just the same. The studios in the area should communicate and get organized so it works out. Hahaha.
Old 11th March 2014
  #13
Old 11th March 2014
  #14
Gear Maniac
 
lapsang's Avatar
 

Three hours seems reasonable...LOL
Old 11th March 2014
  #15
Sounds like a lot of calls I get especially after 8 pm when we are CLOSED. So the first one is off the answering machine...

Hi this is XXXXX I want to get some mastering done. The problem is I don't have any money, I spent it all on recording and mixing. So I was wondering if you could do the mastering for free?? If I get famous I could tell everyone where the CD was mastered. I see by your website that you also do duplication so could I also get 100 CDs done for free? I can pay you for them after I sell them all. Again this is XXXXX and my phone number is XXX-XXX-XXXX. Can you call me back ASAP as I need to get this done soon. Thanks.

Or when they call during the day.

Hi can I speak to someone about mastering.

Sure I am the owner and the mastering engineer.

I have some mastering I need to get done ASAP

OK

Like what are your rates?

$65.00 per hour

Uh OK

Any chance you could do the mastering for free as I don't have any money. I spent it all on recording and mixing. We did the album ourselves.

No I am sorry I don't work for free

OK how about I pay you $200 and you do 22 songs?

22 song would take about 8 to 10 hours so the fee would be a bit more.

Well I don't have any money at least not a lot of money.

OK

We I understand you do really good work

Thanks!

So if you will do this for me for free I will remember you when I get famous.

GREAT!

But as I told you earlier I don't work for free

So you won't do this for free

Correct


I knew I should have called someone else.

Well have a good day and be safe


Both of these were real phone calls from real people.
Old 11th March 2014
  #16
Gotta be someone on a wind-up...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Desire Inspires View Post
This could work out well under the right circumstances.
The fact that it hasn't really ever in recent memory is by the by, huh? Setup/packdown time? I know you like to goad on here (you don't need the cheesy coloured font to stand out) but this is just ignorant. Or maybe you've never worked with an unsigned band.

(yes the beatles may have made their first album in a few hours...I'm guessing this little combo won't be happy with 2 mics on the drums etc...I'd guess their references are a little more up to date).

Quote:
Originally Posted by ignorantape View Post
Our music is very 'poplar'

Are they a tree?
Quote:
Originally Posted by badmark View Post
I heard the drummer is a bit wooden.
Quote:
Originally Posted by noiseflaw View Post
...and the singer can only bark.

Come on guys...leaf it out.....give it a (fo)rest....
Old 11th March 2014
  #17
Quote:
Originally Posted by psycho_monkey View Post
Gotta be someone on a wind-up...

The fact that it hasn't really ever in recent memory is by the by, huh? Setup/packdown time? I know you like to goad on here (you don't need the cheesy coloured font to stand out) but this is just ignorant. Or maybe you've never worked with an unsigned band.

(yes the beatles may have made their first album in a few hours...I'm guessing this little combo won't be happy with 2 mics on the drums etc...I'd guess their references are a little more up to date).
Many things take years and years to manifest. I cannot say for certain that most instances such as this would work out. But to deny the fact that a band that is recorded for free will not be able to return the favor to the studio is a bit premature.

It only takes one instance of this to work for it to become a trend. Is this a gamble? Yes. Is the probability of failure high? Yes. But a studio that passed up on this act would be kicking itself if the band became huge. The studio owners could write a book on the early recordings and would have clients lined up at the door.

If a studio has the resources to provide free recordings to a potentially successful band, I say go for it!
Old 11th March 2014
  #18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Desire Inspires View Post
Many things take years and years to manifest. I cannot say for certain that most instances such as this would work out. But to deny the fact that a band that is recorded for free will not be able to return the favor to the studio is a bit premature.

It only takes one instance of this to work for it to become a trend. Is this a gamble? Yes. Is the probability of failure high? Yes. But a studio that passed up on this act would be kicking itself if the band became huge. The studio owners could write a book on the early recordings and would have clients lined up at the door.

If a studio has the resources to provide free recordings to a potentially successful band, I say go for it!
I've recorded bands for free,I'm sure we all have. But I think the distinction here is that I would OFFER to do so. And that never came with a crap attitude from the band wanting to CHARGE me to be credited. The concept, sure. Build a huge following and a great band and a studio guy who might be connected (wind-up anyone?) might come to you and offer to record you. The D-baggery, entitlement oozing from the ad is the fun part
Old 11th March 2014
  #19
Quote:
Originally Posted by everybody's x View Post
[...] We want to sing into a Newman Mic if possible. [...]

I think that's spelled Noyman. heh



With regard to recording artists/bands for free/cheap... I have, I may again. But, I have to tell you, in way too many cases, even with really nice people, the fact that it is 'free' seems somehow to devalue it in their minds far too often. You get people who treat it more like a social thing, a jam, a goof. Even if they start off conscientious and conscious of the fact you are doing them a big favor, all too often the fact that there's no clock ticking, no formal business arrangements, can have a subtle but erosive effect.
Old 11th March 2014
  #20
Quote:
Originally Posted by everybody's x View Post
The D-baggery, entitlement oozing from the ad is the fun part
Understood.
Old 11th March 2014
  #21
Deleted User
Guest
Quote:
When we go platinum you'll be happy you recorded us for free.
LOL.

Small home studios starting out looking for experience might be interested. Learning can have a value in itself. But you get what you pay for, right?
Old 11th March 2014
  #22
Lives for gear
 
suedesound's Avatar
 

Newman mic? That guy from seinfeld, yeah I wired him up for recording and keep him in the closet. No problem
Old 11th March 2014
  #23
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doom64's Avatar
Go watch the Dave Grohl "Sound City" documentary. Even though Nirvana was a great band they still paid $650 per day to record at Sound City. $650 for two weeks so approximately $8,500. Then when "Nevermind" went to #1 they were getting calls left and right.

Screw these bands who want free services. At the very least you don't get free electric or rent for your facility. So unless you're an absolute newbie with zero credits to your name do NOT do it. Free = a newbie with an SM57 and a $50 chinese condenser mic with stock plugins. Free is not an experienced engineer with a 4-5 figure mic locker plus a collection of plugins or outboard hardware that gets the job done well.

I've attached the quality of engineering that a band should get for free. Actually, maybe even less. I know the people who recorded/mixed this music sample and the gear they used was nicer than what most green audio engineers would have access to.
Attached Files

freerecordingmixing.mp3 (522.4 KB, 128 views)

Old 12th March 2014
  #24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Desire Inspires View Post
Many things take years and years to manifest. I cannot say for certain that most instances such as this would work out. But to deny the fact that a band that is recorded for free will not be able to return the favor to the studio is a bit premature.

It only takes one instance of this to work for it to become a trend. Is this a gamble? Yes. Is the probability of failure high? Yes. But a studio that passed up on this act would be kicking itself if the band became huge. The studio owners could write a book on the early recordings and would have clients lined up at the door.

If a studio has the resources to provide free recordings to a potentially successful band, I say go for it!
I don't know how many of these "bands blowing up" you've seen 1st hand, but every time I've seen it happen the label takes over and makes the decisions. It's happened to me a couple of times, it's happened to friends and it's happened to strangers. I didn't expect to get "brought along" and I did it as a favour for MY friend (who had a vested interest) who's since given me paid work off the back of it, but both times I've done this it was for projects already with label interest, where I knew the quality of the music would be good, and where the band were willing to spend more than 3hrs on one song, let alone an album

As I said - so many cliches it reads like a windup, but if this is the kind of client you'd jump at go for it - prevents the rest of us having to fend them off!
Old 12th March 2014
  #25
Quote:
Originally Posted by psycho_monkey View Post
As I said - so many cliches it reads like a windup, but if this is the kind of client you'd jump at go for it - prevents the rest of us having to fend them off!
Thanks, man!
Old 12th March 2014
  #26
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Uncle Bob's Avatar
 

It's audio post, but fairly similar.

I got a call to do audio post on a feature film. I gave them a quote, we met face-to-face, they said they would get back to me. About a week later they emailed to say they had chosen someone else; that's fine, you don't get every gig. Four months later they call me. Their "choice" had disappeared with the audio post budget and not delivered one minute of sound for the film. Could I please do the entire audio post in three weeks? I said fine and gave a quote of four times the original; instead of doing everything all by myself I would need a separate Foley team and a separate sound effects team while I cut dialog. Oh, we only have $450 left; couldn't you do it for that? $450 isn't even 1% of the new quote. Yes, I understand that it's a passion project, but it's not my passion project. I'm strictly mercenary - you pay, I play.

So it's not just music; everyone wants somethin' for nothin'.
Old 12th March 2014
  #27
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e3p0's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by everybody's x View Post
We would also be willing to advertise your studio for a reasonable fee as well.
This is the part that got me. They want free recording then want to charge the studio for advertising
Old 12th March 2014
  #28
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doom64's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by e3p0 View Post
This is the part that got me. They want free recording then want to charge the studio for advertising
Guys, it's definitely a troll post! Virtually every facepalm inducing cliche that can be thought of was put in the message. To us engineers it's hilarious...hopefully it doesn't inspire any musicians though.
Old 12th March 2014
  #29
Lives for gear
Best thing I ever learned during my internship: The studio always gets paid.

And, yes, I have had people ask me ridiculous questions like that before. I think back to the studio owner where I started out asking a beggar band "can I buy my groceries on spec?" No, the goddamn power company won't take "but I'm working with a cool band" as a form of credit.

Anyone in a band thinking like that, here's a hint: If I wanted to record you for free, I would have called you.
Old 12th March 2014
  #30
Gear Guru
 
kafka's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by everybody's x View Post
Spectacular trolling or just every band I ever run into?
I disagree. I've seen much better trolling than that.
Topic:
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