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New place with neighbors in love
Old 13th November 2009
  #1
New place with neighbors in love

Folks,

So I just moved into this nice new condo and just loving it. 19th floor with views of the buildings and GA mountains. Wow what a place what a view BUT, I seem to have some neighbors (either right beside me or above them) that seem to, well how do you say it, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh love each other around 1 to 2 am just about every night. It is not the head board hitting the wall but sounds like the bed itself, smacking the floor. Thank god it only goes on for about 3 min (poor dude ) but it wakes me up EVERY night. Don't get me wrong I am all for making love and all that good stuff, but hey I need to sleep!! heh Myself being new to the building I want to be as nice about this as possible so not real sure how to "let them know". Any ideas guys??
Old 13th November 2009
  #2
Gear Maniac
 

Give them a company card and sell them something to isolate the sound of their love making! heh
Old 13th November 2009
  #3
Lives for gear
 
Big_Bang's Avatar
 

Congrats!

Nothing like a new place to bring new spirit to your life!

Leave them a bottle of champagne with a pink ribbon on it, with a pacifier attatched to it !

Might make 'em get to the point already heh
Old 13th November 2009
  #4
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skywalker View Post
Give them a company card and sell them something to isolate the sound of their love making! heh
Yea we don't sell any iso products and if I gave them acoustic panels it will only make the love making sound BETTER to them in the room. The guy might "get it over with" quicker though as the sound would enhance the moment!

Quote:
Nothing like a new place to bring new spirit to your life!
I must admit it does!!!!
Old 13th November 2009
  #5
Lives for gear
 

Play the theme from shaft as they start , then give them a rousing cheer as they finish :D
Old 13th November 2009
  #6
Jai guru deva om
 
warhead's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Yago View Post
Play the theme from shaft as they start , then give them a rousing cheer as they finish :D
Yes! That is by far the solution...!

That is awesome...only 3 minutes but 3 minutes of getting LIFT out of the bed?

That's a pounding.

War
Old 13th November 2009
  #7
Gear Maniac
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn Kuras View Post
Yea we don't sell any iso products and if I gave them acoustic panels it will only make the love making sound BETTER to them in the room. The guy might "get it over with" quicker though as the sound would enhance the moment!



I must admit it does!!!!
Maybe itΒ΄s time to expand the business!!!
Old 13th November 2009
  #8
Lives for gear
 
-silent-sam-'s Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn Kuras View Post
Folks,

So I just moved into this nice new condo and just loving it. 19th floor with views of the buildings and GA mountains. Wow what a place what a view BUT, I seem to have some neighbors (either right beside me or above them) that seem to, well how do you say it, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh love each other around 1 to 2 am just about every night. It is not the head board hitting the wall but sounds like the bed itself, smacking the floor. Thank god it only goes on for about 3 min (poor dude ) but it wakes me up EVERY night. Don't get me wrong I am all for making love and all that good stuff, but hey I need to sleep!! heh Myself being new to the building I want to be as nice about this as possible so not real sure how to "let them know". Any ideas guys??
Try yelling "**** her!... **** her good!"
Old 13th November 2009
  #9
Gear Maniac
 
hank alrich's Avatar
 

Record it and play it back fairly loudly in the morning...
Old 13th November 2009
  #10
Jax
Lives for gear
 

I'm moving this weekend into a new apartment. With any luck all my neighbors are old folks, except one who hopefully looks like Salma Hayek, has no man and wants one like me, and lives across the hall.

I'm on the top floor, so no humpty bumpty from above, but there's a neighbor on one side. If there's hanky panky next door, I'm hoping they're the reserved type.

In your situation, if it went on for a long time (a month or so), I'd go up and knock on their door. Tell them you're happy they found love in this cold world, and have a catalog of heavy rubber mats in hand. Ask them to put it under their bed, explaining that you wake up every night due to the noise... nuff said.

Short of that, I like sam's idea.
Old 13th November 2009
  #11
Lives for gear
 
toneguru's Avatar
Do what I did...

Get yourself a chick of your own to bang...

but bang for 6 minutes (twice as long) and at 3AM.
Old 13th November 2009
  #12
Lives for gear
 

Start making "LoveTraps" that concentrate on the frequencies of bodies hitting each other.
Old 14th November 2009
  #13
I am getting some great ideas. The best is kind of 2 put together. Record them "doing it" then in the morning knock on there door and play it for them. Do you think they will have me over for dinner????

7:30 pm here in Atlanta. About 6 more hours until SHOW TIME!!!!
Old 14th November 2009
  #14
Lives for gear
 
rectifier's Avatar
 

I read all of this and all I can picture is Ethan Winer stroking his huge pussy.
Old 14th November 2009
  #15
Here for the gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by rectifier View Post
I read all of this and all I can picture is Ethan Winer stroking his huge pussy.
This.
Old 14th November 2009
  #16
Lives for gear
 
BlackBackDrop's Avatar
 

Small world buddy, in fact its normally 1:30 am (she is ocd with time) and its for 4 minutes if you want to nit pick? And yeah the view is great!

LOL only kidding...

I would not worry, if he can only last 3 mins the relationship wont last long. It takes 7 mins of constant sexually stimulation for a woman to reach... well you know... so she aint getin no satisfaction? unless there is a roll over... then maybe she does on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Anyway, speak to them and come back and tell us what they said? It could be worse, she could be a screamer!
Old 14th November 2009
  #17
member no 666
 
Fletcher's Avatar
Peruse Mason Industries range of products and purchase a set of 4 shock isolators which can be installed under the legs that support their bed... wander upstairs with a bottle of wine and the box of isolators... with a spiel something like "Hi, I'm new here and live downstairs... and have come to notice that you have a nightly ritual that kinda wakes me up every night. I work in the acoustics industry [yeah, its OK to lie in this instance] and was wondering if we could install these shock isolators so you can have your privacy".

If shes cute, maybe make a mention that you can go longer than 3 minutes [again, its OK to lie in this instance]
Old 14th November 2009
  #18
Gear Maniac
 
Acko's Avatar
 

Glen, perhaps jerk off and go back to sleep. If I was in his shoes(i.e.girlfriend), and had a choice between having my 3 minutes of horizontal folkdancing or letting the audio geek downstairs have his beauty sleep, I know which I'd choose.

Maybe you could sell them some bass traps. Never miss an opportunity.
Old 14th November 2009
  #19
Gear Guru
 
Sounds Great's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jax View Post
I'm moving this weekend into a new apartment. With any luck all my neighbors are old folks, except one who hopefully looks like Salma Hayek, has no man and wants one like me, and lives across the hall.
I lived in an apartment in LA across the hall from Neve Campbell in the mid 90's.

Unfortunately she was married at the time. Oh wait, so was I.

She really is a very nice girl. thumbsup
Old 14th November 2009
  #20
Jax
Lives for gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by andrewenson View Post

either that or put on a richard simmons costume, hide in their closet and freak the living shat out of them
hahaha best idea yet
Old 14th November 2009
  #21
Lives for gear
 
-silent-sam-'s Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by silent-sam View Post
Try yelling "**** her!... **** her good!"
Quote:
Originally Posted by andrewenson View Post
break in to their condo, saw the legs on the bed. next

either that or put on a richard simmons costume, hide in their closet and freak the living shat out of them
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jax View Post
hahaha best idea yet
I think this could make another good "COMBO"......

Change the Richard Simmons costume to a full blown Gene Simmons "deamon" costume. Now hide in the closet until they start getting busy.... assuming the lights are off, quietly sneak out into the bed room, lean down close to his ear, and In a DEEP SEXY Gene Simmons voice quietly say "**** her.... **** her good".... maybe toss a "yeah" in there.

Just don't fall asleep in the closet..... remember you only have a 3 minute window of opportunity.

This should scare the crap out of them.... but if they are really kinky it might extend the problem from 3 minutes a night to 6 minutes a night..... In which case, sorry for the suggestion.
Old 15th November 2009
  #22
Lives for gear
 

This thread is going on my favorites list.
Old 16th November 2009
  #23
Lives for gear
 
Lrmusic's Avatar
 

Two options.

1. Earplugs w/ 50db cut at about 528 hz
2. Send an intern into the future to record their ****ing session each night, reverse the polarity, and trigger it to play when they start ****ing. While you're at it, have the intern pick up some M1D1 cables.
Old 16th November 2009
  #24
Gear Nut
 
oceanblue's Avatar
 

Go to the printer and have a life size carboard cut out of Ron Jeremy done, leave it at their fron door with a note pinned over the crotch telling them to keep it down or you'll going to have to come over and take matters into your own hands....only if she's hot of course!

Or go get one of those air horns in a can and let it loose about the time you think he is about to reach the mountain top...couple times and Pavlov's pecker should be all done!
Old 16th November 2009
  #25
Gear Guru
 
kafka's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn Kuras View Post
Myself being new to the building I want to be as nice about this as possible so not real sure how to "let them know". Any ideas guys??
Have you tried pounding on the ceiling with a broom handle and shouting at them to shut the f**k up? That's always worked for me.
Old 16th November 2009
  #26
Ok so I met the neighbors. He is this Italian guy in his 50s and she is bleached blond in her mid 20s. It is starting to make total sense now. I didn't say anything but they seemed to be kind of quit. Our condo association has a management company so I contacted them which they said they would have a talk with them. We shall see.
Old 16th November 2009
  #27
Lives for gear
 
Plush's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn Kuras View Post
Ok so I met the neighbors. He is this Italian guy in his 50s and she is bleached blond in her mid 20s. It is starting to make total sense now. I didn't say anything but they seemed to be kind of quit. Our condo association has a management company so I contacted them which they said they would have a talk with them. We shall see.
Consult a medical professional if your erection lasts more than four hours.
Old 16th November 2009
  #28
Lives for gear
 
Blast9's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn Kuras View Post
... in his 50s and she is... in her mid 20s.

So he's poor and very good looking... and she's taking him out to posh restaurants evey nite
Old 16th November 2009
  #29
Gear Addict
 

nononono. Use it as an opportunity to have some fun.



It's so easy to fix...do you have a wireless network?

rename the network to

"We can hear you having it off in (condo number/address)"

comme ca:

That’s a WIN in my book Β« FAIL Blog: Epic Fail Pictures and Videos of Owned, Pwnd and Fail Moments

Should take a few days but they'll notice.
Old 16th November 2009
  #30
Quote:
Originally Posted by londontown View Post
nononono. Use it as an opportunity to have some fun.



It's so easy to fix...do you have a wireless network?

rename the network to

"We can hear you having it off in (condo number/address)"

comme ca:

That’s a WIN in my book Β« FAIL Blog: Epic Fail Pictures and Videos of Owned, Pwnd and Fail Moments

Should take a few days but they'll notice.
I think I may take you up on that! Now I need to figure out how to change the name.
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