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Why most recording engineers suck... Effects Pedals, Units & Accessories
Old 3rd August 2008
  #151
Smile

Quote:
Originally Posted by drmmrboy View Post
Dude is this really your myspace..??

I don't think I'm one of the AE greats out there, but I definitely don't suck..
And after visiting your myspace, I feel like a frickin genius..


lol - maybe he used the incorrect MDG (myspace distortion generator)

and MSG (myspace song generator) settings?


.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #152
Quote:
Originally Posted by blackened View Post
And by the way, James Meeker says he is a proffessional... These are the types of engineers i'm talking about.
Dude, you're funny!

This thread is shaping up to be a classic.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #153
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plexisys's Avatar
 

.... lights another cigarette while enjoying the next show of this series....wonders if I should let the dog out for a quick piss.....No, on with the show first......Mind starts to stray....Wonders what the atomic weight of peanut butter is.... Dammit, focus Michael, focus, on with the show....
Old 3rd August 2008
  #154
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RawBeanZen's Avatar
 

Talking

LOVING this thread.

thumbsup thumbsup thumbsup
Old 3rd August 2008
  #155
Quote:
Originally Posted by blackened View Post
And by the way, I am an engineer and work as an engineer at one of the top studios in Texas. I sit down in front of SSL every day brother, so don't pull some bull**** on me.
I'm sure you look good sitting behind it!

Old 3rd August 2008
  #156
Here for the gear
 

i love this comment on his myspace page:

Apr 23 2007 4:37 PM

HEY BLACKENED FAGGOT HOWS ABOUT YOU PRACTICE YOUR SINGING VOICE INSTEAD OF HITTING ON OTHER PEOPLES WOMEN!! O YEA AND YOU SHOULD REALLY GO BACK TO BOSTON AND STICK SOME CREAM PIE UP YOUR ASS CUZ WE DONT WANT YOUR REJECT KIND IN DALLAS FAGGOT BY THE WAY VINNIE ONLY SIGNS ORIGINAL ACTS NOT GODSMACK HENRY ROLLINS WANNA BEES
Old 3rd August 2008
  #157
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RawBeanZen's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by jefferson View Post
i love this comment on his myspace page:

Apr 23 2007 4:37 PM

HEY BLACKENED FAGGOT HOWS ABOUT YOU PRACTICE YOUR SINGING VOICE INSTEAD OF HITTING ON OTHER PEOPLES WOMEN!! O YEA AND YOU SHOULD REALLY GO BACK TO BOSTON AND STICK SOME CREAM PIE UP YOUR ASS CUZ WE DONT WANT YOUR REJECT KIND IN DALLAS FAGGOT BY THE WAY VINNIE ONLY SIGNS ORIGINAL ACTS NOT GODSMACK HENRY ROLLINS WANNA BEES
Subtle.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #158
Smile

Originally Posted by jigsawlogic
"Most musicians are failed musicians."

Quote:
Originally Posted by winvbass View Post
LOL!!!
And that should be an end to it!
omg - say no more..this thread is great...

just what i needed for my chappelle show surrogate sunday afternoon comedy session...

fabulous thread. what a riot - thanks for the laughs, guys...
.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #159
Smile

.

Originally Posted by blackened

"And by the way, our music is badass".

---------------------------------------------------------


well, i agree - it is bad, and it definitely sounds like ass...

so it probably qualifies...




i'm just fukking with you - i don't actually plan on taking you seriously enough to listen to your music...

ah, well......my loss, i s'ppose...

.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #160
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plexisys's Avatar
 

/.... my mind wants to stray again......does a 20 db pad change the whole universe. If all things are linked in the universe truly it must.......focus you ingrate you can't buy this kind of entertainment......more,more, more...continues to smoke and read......../
Old 3rd August 2008
  #161
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Greg Curtis's Avatar
 

love the snaredrum, because it sounds like dry clave sticks.

Some great quotes, great rants. Classic thread!
Old 3rd August 2008
  #162
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s.d.finley's Avatar
This ******bag prolly just wanted a bunch of hits on his crappy myspace page.

BTW blackened, your metal is the worst **** ever! Please tell us it was all done on a cassette 4 track, and we might have a lil respect for you.

If it was done at a world class ssl studio, you need to cut your losses now, and poke out your eardrums with an ice pick. Save us all from that horrid crap you call metal.

You can post here all you want about wannbes, but we all know who the real
wanna be is....

Vee are nilhist, vee beleive in nuttang!!!

Old 3rd August 2008
  #163
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Jaques Beraques's Avatar
 

I nominate Blackened for the next guest-moderator!!!!!!!
Old 3rd August 2008
  #164
Moderator
 
narcoman's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by RonCarlston View Post
No way this guy is serious...i fell for it.


you trolled me hook line and sinker.




there is just no way you stand beside that music i refuse to believe it.
indeed!heh
Old 3rd August 2008
  #165
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Quote:
Originally Posted by James Meeker View Post
Normally I avoid these types of threads because nothing good can come out of them. Spending too much time around an idiot ...
... It actually takes genius degrees of anti-talent to get music to sound this bad.. Hopefully....

.... I'm professional....

Although I disagree with the original post ,publicly cutting up the man's art is not cool....at all. First of all we are all at different stages of our creative development and all stages are important period. Secondly...I listened to the music...I thought it was alright...not my cup of tea...but it sounds like Blacky worked hard on it and I am 100% positive that all of us (including you James) have worked on much much worse sounding records...it's not that bad boys...he's just a bit of an assface...certainly not an isolated incident in our industry.

Nick
Old 3rd August 2008
  #166
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Mr.HOLMES's Avatar
so please tell us at which top studio you work in texas behind your ssl!!!
G.W. Bush is even another guy from Texas who is overestimating his skills as chief of the USA.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #167
Smile

Quote:
Originally Posted by nickynicknick View Post
he's just a bit of an assface...certainly not an isolated incident in our industry.

Nick
WHAT????!!!!.......there are even MORE ASS FACES??? .......WHERE???.............

.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #168
Lives for gear
 
Jaques Beraques's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sqye View Post
WHAT????!!!!.......there are even MORE ASS FACES??? .......WHERE???......

.
Here!!
My girl said that a few days ago!!
Old 3rd August 2008
  #169
Gear Guru
 
Karloff70's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by RonCarlston View Post
No way this guy is serious...i fell for it.


you trolled me hook line and sinker.




there is just no way you stand beside that music i refuse to believe it.
I don't know......I think tragically perhaps, it's a possibility....

Doesn't really matter though as either way all this laughing has been a great present for everyone here...perhaps it was designed to alleviate all that pain mentioned earlier for everyone momentarily. If so, it has worked a treat, is still working and qualifies as a great gift!heh

Close enough to really good comedy.......
Old 3rd August 2008
  #170
Moderator
 
narcoman's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.HOLMES View Post
so please tell us at which top studio you work in texas behind your ssl!!!
Oh he's in Texas eh?

Well - i think i'll show this thread to three key friends - then when he goes to book his SSW show he'll get some interesting responses at his gig! could be fun!
Old 3rd August 2008
  #171
I wonder if the singer has a crow on his shoulder when he sings.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #172
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaques Beraques View Post
I nominate Blackened for the next guest-moderator!!!!!!!
I can see some of the threads now!

Guest: How do you achieve that singular guitar tone?

Blackened: First off you have to be God and live and breathe metal, even while wallowing in the blackest pits of despair. Note that aforementioned wallowing must not be done in gothic or emo pits of despair, but the blackest of metal pits of despair!

Guest: Ummm, okay...

Blackened: Then you must sit in front of the SSL, in defiance of Eddie Van Halen and all that is holy, and contemplate the futility of making records that the unwashed masses cannot comprehend. Only when you have reached the proper levels of nihilism can you proceed.

Guest: What does this have to do about getting guitar sound?

Blackened: Hold your tongue fool, this is just another example of the weak trying to destroy the strong! If you had any vision or understanding of what it truly means to be metal you wouldn't have to ask such questions?

Guest: Okay, moving along now--what mics are you using?

Blackened: I only use dynamic microphones because they are the most dynamic sounding mics. As metal is the most blasphemous and dynamic music this is appropriate. Condenser mics by their design condense the sound. This is why all other music sounds puny compared to mine, condenser mics! Plus phantom power robs a sound of any true metal tone.

Guest: Interesting, how do you approach equalization of your guitar tracks?

Blackened: I make ample use of the SSL I sit in front of in a most metal fashion. I always set the EQ on the console for a plus 15 decibel boost on the six kilohertz shelf band. This is the crux of the 'buzzing bee' tone that is oh-so uber-metal. Then I follow this up by cutting everything under four hundred kilohertz by 15 decibels on the low shelf. This sets the stage for establishing the ice pick attack.

Guest: Wow, that's some pretty radical EQ!

Blackened: That's nothing. Then I route each guitar track to the SSL's matrix and assign it to a new channel where I boost the top end by another 15 decibels and cut the low end by another 15 decibels. Sometimes if the metal has to really cut through I'll do this three or four times!

Guest: Wow, that explains a lot....

Blackened: If your feeble mind can understand what I'm even elucidating. I suspect you're one of those weak, un-metal recording engineers barely able to understand how we are all slaves in this world of depraved conformity. In fact, you are unworthy to even gape in awe at my presence.... In fact, you're lucky I don't beat you senseless with my bullet belt, you whining welp!

[subject immediately gets up, picks up his Squire Strat and Gorilla amplifier, throwing devil horns and storms out of the room]
Old 3rd August 2008
  #173
Lives for gear
 
Jaques Beraques's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Meeker View Post
I can see some of the threads now!

Guest: How do you achieve that singular guitar tone?

Blackened: First off you have to be God and live and breathe metal, even while wallowing in the blackest pits of despair. Note that aforementioned wallowing must not be done in gothic or emo pits of despair, but the blackest of metal pits of despair!

Guest: Ummm, okay...

Blackened: Then you must sit in front of the SSL, in defiance of Eddie Van Halen and all that is holy, and contemplate the futility of making records that the unwashed masses cannot comprehend. Only when you have reached the proper levels of nihilism can you proceed.

Guest: What does this have to do about getting guitar sound?

Blackened: Hold your tongue fool, this is just another example of the weak trying to destroy the strong! If you had any vision or understanding of what it truly means to be metal you wouldn't have to ask such questions?

Guest: Okay, moving along now--what mics are you using?

Blackened: I only use dynamic microphones because they are the most dynamic sounding mics. As metal is the most blasphemous and dynamic music this is appropriate. Condenser mics by their design condense the sound. This is why all other music sounds puny compared to mine, condenser mics! Plus phantom power robs a sound of any true metal tone.

Guest: Interesting, how do you approach equalization of your guitar tracks?

Blackened: I make ample use of the SSL I sit in front of in a most metal fashion. I always set the EQ on the console for a plus 15 decibel boost on the six kilohertz shelf band. This is the crux of the 'buzzing bee' tone that is oh-so uber-metal. Then I follow this up by cutting everything under four hundred kilohertz by 15 decibels on the low shelf. This sets the stage for establishing the ice pick attack.

Guest: Wow, that's some pretty radical EQ!

Blackened: That's nothing. Then I route each guitar track to the SSL's matrix and assign it to a new channel where I boost the top end by another 15 decibels and cut the low end by another 15 decibels. Sometimes if the metal has to really cut through I'll do this three or four times!

Guest: Wow, that explains a lot....

Blackened: If your feeble mind can understand what I'm even elucidating. I suspect you're one of those weak, un-metal recording engineers barely able to understand how we are all slaves in this world of depraved conformity. In fact, you are unworthy to even gape in awe at my presence.... In fact, you're lucky I don't beat you senseless with my bullet belt, you whining welp!

[subject immediately gets up, picks up his Squire Strat and Gorilla amplifier, throwing devil horns and storms out of the room]
James,
seriously please write a book.
If I would be Blackened, your post would be the moment where I would start to cry.
thumbsupthumbsupthumbsupthumbsupthumbsupthumbsupthumbsup
Old 3rd August 2008
  #174
Quote:
Originally Posted by james meeker View Post
i can see some of the threads now!

guest: how do you achieve that singular guitar tone?

blackened: first off you have to be god and live and breathe metal, even while wallowing in the blackest pits of despair. Note that aforementioned wallowing must not be done in gothic or emo pits of despair, but the blackest of metal pits of despair!

guest: ummm, okay...

blackened: then you must sit in front of the ssl, in defiance of eddie van halen and all that is holy, and contemplate the futility of making records that the unwashed masses cannot comprehend. Only when you have reached the proper levels of nihilism can you proceed.

guest: what does this have to do about getting guitar sound?

blackened: hold your tongue fool, this is just another example of the weak trying to destroy the strong! If you had any vision or understanding of what it truly means to be metal you wouldn't have to ask such questions?

guest: okay, moving along now--what mics are you using?

blackened: i only use dynamic microphones because they are the most dynamic sounding mics. As metal is the most blasphemous and dynamic music this is appropriate. Condenser mics by their design condense the sound. This is why all other music sounds puny compared to mine, condenser mics! Plus phantom power robs a sound of any true metal tone.

guest: interesting, how do you approach equalization of your guitar tracks?

blackened: i make ample use of the ssl i sit in front of in a most metal fashion. I always set the eq on the console for a plus 15 decibel boost on the six kilohertz shelf band. This is the crux of the 'buzzing bee' tone that is oh-so uber-metal. Then i follow this up by cutting everything under four hundred kilohertz by 15 decibels on the low shelf. This sets the stage for establishing the ice pick attack.

guest: wow, that's some pretty radical eq!

blackened: that's nothing. Then i route each guitar track to the ssl's matrix and assign it to a new channel where i boost the top end by another 15 decibels and cut the low end by another 15 decibels. Sometimes if the metal has to really cut through i'll do this three or four times!

guest: wow, that explains a lot....

blackened: if your feeble mind can understand what i'm even elucidating. I suspect you're one of those weak, un-metal recording engineers barely able to understand how we are all slaves in this world of depraved conformity. In fact, you are unworthy to even gape in awe at my presence.... In fact, you're lucky i don't beat you senseless with my bullet belt, you whining welp!

[subject immediately gets up, picks up his squire strat and gorilla amplifier, throwing devil horns and storms out of the room]

hahahhaahahhahahahahahahahaha!!!!
Old 3rd August 2008
  #175
Lives for gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Meeker View Post
I can see some of the threads now!

Guest: How do you achieve that singular guitar tone?

Blackened: First off you have to be God and live and breathe metal, even while wallowing in the blackest pits of despair. Note that aforementioned wallowing must not be done in gothic or emo pits of despair, but the blackest of metal pits of despair!

Guest: Ummm, okay...

Blackened: Then you must sit in front of the SSL, in defiance of Eddie Van Halen and all that is holy, and contemplate the futility of making records that the unwashed masses cannot comprehend. Only when you have reached the proper levels of nihilism can you proceed.

Guest: What does this have to do about getting guitar sound?

Blackened: Hold your tongue fool, this is just another example of the weak trying to destroy the strong! If you had any vision or understanding of what it truly means to be metal you wouldn't have to ask such questions?

Guest: Okay, moving along now--what mics are you using?

Blackened: I only use dynamic microphones because they are the most dynamic sounding mics. As metal is the most blasphemous and dynamic music this is appropriate. Condenser mics by their design condense the sound. This is why all other music sounds puny compared to mine, condenser mics! Plus phantom power robs a sound of any true metal tone.

Guest: Interesting, how do you approach equalization of your guitar tracks?

Blackened: I make ample use of the SSL I sit in front of in a most metal fashion. I always set the EQ on the console for a plus 15 decibel boost on the six kilohertz shelf band. This is the crux of the 'buzzing bee' tone that is oh-so uber-metal. Then I follow this up by cutting everything under four hundred kilohertz by 15 decibels on the low shelf. This sets the stage for establishing the ice pick attack.

Guest: Wow, that's some pretty radical EQ!

Blackened: That's nothing. Then I route each guitar track to the SSL's matrix and assign it to a new channel where I boost the top end by another 15 decibels and cut the low end by another 15 decibels. Sometimes if the metal has to really cut through I'll do this three or four times!

Guest: Wow, that explains a lot....

Blackened: If your feeble mind can understand what I'm even elucidating. I suspect you're one of those weak, un-metal recording engineers barely able to understand how we are all slaves in this world of depraved conformity. In fact, you are unworthy to even gape in awe at my presence.... In fact, you're lucky I don't beat you senseless with my bullet belt, you whining welp!

[subject immediately gets up, picks up his Squire Strat and Gorilla amplifier, throwing devil horns and storms out of the room]
James...you're makin' yourself look bad...c'mon.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #176
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thermos's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by blackened View Post
Most recording engineers are failed musicians. As a musician, I have very little respect for recording engineers. The field of audio engineering is a field that should have no ego. That is a job for musicians. A matter of fact, engineering is a job well suited for a musician. I am both an engineer and musician, and being a musician gives my ear the musical training that most engineers would only dream to have.

The problem here is that engineers charge a lot of money merely to do something they enjoy, and most engineers deliver less than satisfactory results. This is the reason for the explosion of everybody and their mother having a Pro Tools rig. What musician would want to deal with some screwball engineer when for the most part, we would be better off just doing it ourselves?

The job of the engineer is to record the musician, and in the mixdown, enhance the vision of the musician in the recorded medium. As a musician, dealing with audio engineers is almost always a waste of time and money. The prices studios charge are outrageous. If most studios could deliver a great product at a reasonable price, then that would be one thing, but the truth is most studios can't.

I offer up a scenario. Band X goes into Studio Waste A Lot to record said album. Band X spends five thousand dollars in studio time tracking, and after mixdown they are unhappy with the results. Studio Waste A Lot says the mix is great, and the recording is great. What recourse does band X have. Court? Na probably not.

So, bands need to be very weary of all studios and flakey engineers. Most engineers suffer from extreme OCD. I'm saying that seriously. Also, I believe that after all is said and done, musicians should never assume that just because a studio has an SSL or Neve that they will get good results. Why do I say this? Well let's just say i've lived it.

Blackened
That is the funniest post I think I have ever read.

I also might add, that that is a very familiar attitude I've seen directed towards artists from A&R/label people. They sure as hell don't need you cretan non business oriented musicians, but you sure as hell need them to become rich and famous! Otherwise, there is absolutely no validity to what you do.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #177
Lives for gear
 
s.d.finley's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by nickynicknick View Post
James...you're makin' yourself look bad...c'mon.
Look bad? James, that is frickin heeelarious!!! Thats should be an SNL skit, right with "more cowbell...from hell!!"

Old 3rd August 2008
  #178
Gear Addict
 

you're dumb.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #179
Lives for gear
 
plexisys's Avatar
 

I believe you can now order Devil Horns on line at GC. 5% off with any distortion pedal of $10.00 or more.
Old 3rd August 2008
  #180
Smile

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaques Beraques View Post
I nominate Blackened for the next guest-moderator!!!!!!!
hilarious. i second that - maybe lo-end theory mod?

.
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