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Old 3rd June 2020
  #9691
Lives for gear
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anthony Quinn View Post
So here are some examples of some small spots:

.27 - .28 The bass goes down and guitar should follow prob

.41 - .44 Guitar should prob try to match the changes

.56 - .59 Same

It's that going on throughout the track.

But to me, the main issue is it is stealing a lot of energy from the strength of your changes from 1.23 - 1.53

And then the guitar solos for a few bars but doesn't really outline the song.

You have such a great harmonic structure going in my opinion, but it isn't being derived or driven from this guitar, so I think it's getting too much focus unless it can also match the changes and harmonic structure, and kind of drive it.

I have to say this has been one of the most enjoyable tracks I've focused in on and critiqued in awhile. Great work.

Oh yeah, almost forgot to mention, I think transposing an audio region in the inspector is in fact the same as flexing, so I think it is the same even if you went in and tried to manually flex pitch. In this case, you probably are better off splitting the audio into new regions and flexing them through transpose in the inspector. That said I can't be certain how it will go.
Fantastic thanks. I will see what I can do and appreciate the time and feedback and the kind comments. All the best.
Old 3rd June 2020
  #9692
Gear Nut
 
Anthony Quinn's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr Funk View Post
Fantastic thanks. I will see what I can do and appreciate the time and feedback and the kind comments. All the best.
No prob. In about an hour I'm going to post a track I'm working on, so we'll see how that goes.
Old 3rd June 2020
  #9693
Here for the gear
 

Here's a song I wrote/recorded in a rush over the weekend. I'd like to find a female vocalist to sing instead. Not quite sure what to make of it! https://soundcloud.com/wheatfield-1/magnet
Old 3rd June 2020
  #9694
Lives for gear
 
wagtunes's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
Here's a song I wrote/recorded in a rush over the weekend. I'd like to find a female vocalist to sing instead. Not quite sure what to make of it! https://soundcloud.com/wheatfield-1/magnet
Only commenting on the song structure

Intro - Catchy

Verse - Also catchy. Song already has a nice hook to it

Chorus - Kind of falls apart here. It's just the same chord pattern with no further development.

There is great potential in this song but it needs a lot more development. Right now it's just a chord progression over and over and not much else.

Some suggestions. Do something different with the chorus and maybe add a bridge to it.
Old 3rd June 2020
  #9695
Here for the gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by wagtunes View Post
Only commenting on the song structure

Intro - Catchy

Verse - Also catchy. Song already has a nice hook to it

Chorus - Kind of falls apart here. It's just the same chord pattern with no further development.

There is great potential in this song but it needs a lot more development. Right now it's just a chord progression over and over and not much else.

Some suggestions. Do something different with the chorus and maybe add a bridge to it.
Thanks, good feedback. I agree. In my mind the "chorus" is what you call the verse. The second verse definitely needs lyrics. A bridge is a good idea, will work on this.
Old 3rd June 2020
  #9696
Lives for gear
 
wagtunes's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
Thanks, good feedback. I agree. In my mind the "chorus" is what you call the verse. The second verse definitely needs lyrics. A bridge is a good idea, will work on this.
Then if that's the case, technically, the structure of this song, there is no chorus.

It's AAAA

Question: Have you had any music theory? Just curious.
Old 3rd June 2020
  #9697
Here for the gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by wagtunes View Post
Then if that's the case, technically, the structure of this song, there is no chorus.

It's AAAA

Question: Have you had any music theory? Just curious.
I never took any courses on music theory. It goes verse /chorus /double verse /double chorus /double verse. It's a weird structure. When I recorded it I was envisioning more lyrics on the second verse and just fading on on the final verse.
Old 3rd June 2020
  #9698
Lives for gear
 
wagtunes's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
I never took any courses on music theory. It goes verse /chorus /double verse /double chorus /double verse. It's a weird structure. When I recorded it I was envisioning more lyrics on the second verse and just fading on on the final verse.
Well, because of the musical sameness it's difficult to differentiate the chorus from the verse. Werewolves Of London had a similar problem but with that song you at least had the tag line "Werewolves Of London" so you could tell with certainty that you'd arrived at the refrain. With your song, and the lack of lyrics in places, it is difficult to tell what's what. Like I said, maybe some modification of the musical chord structure might help clearly define which is which.

These are only suggestions and ultimately it's your song to do with as you please. Rule number 1, be yourself and only listen to yourself in the final analysis. You are the only one you need to make happy with your composition. Don't ever lose sight of that.
Old 3rd June 2020
  #9699
Lives for gear
 
clump's Avatar
 

I don't very often do 'cover versions'...this was to be part of a tribute album to Adrian Borland...It's my (quite folkie) take on The Sound's "Winter"
Attached Files

WINTER MP3.mp3 (7.77 MB, 493 views)

Old 4th June 2020
  #9700
Here for the gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
Here's a song I wrote/recorded in a rush over the weekend. I'd like to find a female vocalist to sing instead. Not quite sure what to make of it! https://soundcloud.com/wheatfield-1/magnet
You got a great vibe going here and the production is just right for this track. Reminds me of something that would of been played at The Roadhouse in Twin Peaks The Return. I can picture (hear?) it with a super airy female vocal singing the main lines with your "ha ha ha" background vocals. Definitely keep the "ha ha ha" background vocal part as is, I think it really adds to the vibe.

As noted, it does get a bit repetitive. Just a few ideas to kind of break it up without doing a major overhaul/writing new sections.

I think you could employ some muting on tracks to get some variation throughout. Like maybe everything but the piano riff is muted for a few bars, or maybe everything drops out and its just the vocal and kick.

You could also let the intro build more tension by letting it run just the kick for the first like 5 seconds, then slow bring up the synth stab part after a few seconds, then the piano, ect. Or reverse it and start with the synth stabs and slowly fade up the kick (check out Taylor Swift's The Archer, it has an intro kind of like this suggestion that I've been trying to "retool.")

A synth string melody with the current progression over a section would also change it up a bit and maybe create a sort of mid-8. I believe the Chromatics' song Shadow does something similar, and of course it has a very similar vibe to this track (also featured on Twin Peaks).

Anyway, just some ideas from a different perspective. You're off to a great start, looking forward to seeing where you take it.
Old 4th June 2020
  #9701
Lives for gear
 
clump's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
Here's a song I wrote/recorded in a rush over the weekend. I'd like to find a female vocalist to sing instead. Not quite sure what to make of it! https://soundcloud.com/wheatfield-1/magnet
As noted by 'myhatguy' this song has a great filmic feel, it is very atmospheric, and it is also hooky without relying on the conventional 'verse chorus verse' structure.

I agree it would sound great with an ethereal female vocal.

Very nice.
Old 4th June 2020
  #9702
Here for the gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by MyHatGuy View Post
You got a great vibe going here and the production is just right for this track. Reminds me of something that would of been played at The Roadhouse in Twin Peaks The Return. I can picture (hear?) it with a super airy female vocal singing the main lines with your "ha ha ha" background vocals. Definitely keep the "ha ha ha" background vocal part as is, I think it really adds to the vibe.

As noted, it does get a bit repetitive. Just a few ideas to kind of break it up without doing a major overhaul/writing new sections.

I think you could employ some muting on tracks to get some variation throughout. Like maybe everything but the piano riff is muted for a few bars, or maybe everything drops out and its just the vocal and kick.

You could also let the intro build more tension by letting it run just the kick for the first like 5 seconds, then slow bring up the synth stab part after a few seconds, then the piano, ect. Or reverse it and start with the synth stabs and slowly fade up the kick (check out Taylor Swift's The Archer, it has an intro kind of like this suggestion that I've been trying to "retool.")

A synth string melody with the current progression over a section would also change it up a bit and maybe create a sort of mid-8. I believe the Chromatics' song Shadow does something similar, and of course it has a very similar vibe to this track (also featured on Twin Peaks).

Anyway, just some ideas from a different perspective. You're off to a great start, looking forward to seeing where you take it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MyHatGuy View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
Here's a song I wrote/recorded in a rush over the weekend. I'd like to find a female vocalist to sing instead. Not quite sure what to make of it! https://soundcloud.com/wheatfield-1/magnet
You got a great vibe going here and the production is just right for this track. Reminds me of something that would of been played at The Roadhouse in Twin Peaks The Return. I can picture (hear?) it with a super airy female vocal singing the main lines with your "ha ha ha" background vocals. Definitely keep the "ha ha ha" background vocal part as is, I think it really adds to the vibe.

As noted, it does get a bit repetitive. Just a few ideas to kind of break it up without doing a major overhaul/writing new sections.

I think you could employ some muting on tracks to get some variation throughout. Like maybe everything but the piano riff is muted for a few bars, or maybe everything drops out and its just the vocal and kick.

You could also let the intro build more tension by letting it run just the kick for the first like 5 seconds, then slow bring up the synth stab part after a few seconds, then the piano, ect. Or reverse it and start with the synth stabs and slowly fade up the kick (check out Taylor Swift's The Archer, it has an intro kind of like this suggestion that I've been trying to "retool.")

A synth string melody with the current progression over a section would also change it up a bit and maybe create a sort of mid-8. I believe the Chromatics' song Shadow does something similar, and of course it has a very similar vibe to this track (also featured on Twin Peaks).

Anyway, just some ideas from a different perspective. You're off to a great start, looking forward to seeing where you take it.
Awesome, great ideas, will re-work this with those in mind. I really would like to find a female vocalist to work with. Any tips on how to go about that, haha. Oh and “The Archer”, amazing song, one of my favorites from her easily. Do you do a lot of production work?
Old 4th June 2020
  #9703
Here for the gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by clump View Post
As noted by 'myhatguy' this song has a great filmic feel, it is very atmospheric, and it is also hooky without relying on the conventional 'verse chorus verse' structure.

I agree it would sound great with an ethereal female vocal.

Very nice.
Thanks! Any recommendations on how to find the right vocalist?
Old 4th June 2020
  #9704
Lives for gear
 
clump's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
Thanks! Any recommendations on how to find the right vocalist?
Networking....Although I don't do major 'social media' myself...that is the obvious route. Build yourself a body of work, set up a profile dedicated to your music, and connect and network as widely as possible.
Old 4th June 2020
  #9705
Gear Addict
Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
Here's a song I wrote/recorded in a rush over the weekend. I'd like to find a female vocalist to sing instead. Not quite sure what to make of it! https://soundcloud.com/wheatfield-1/magnet
I didn't make it all the way through and I was trying, way too repetitive, and a bore. But you got this far, don't give up, keep learning, expanding and improving, we all had to start somewhere and there are people in here lifetimes ahead of me.
Old 4th June 2020
  #9706
Here for the gear
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by wheatfield View Post
Awesome, great ideas, will re-work this with those in mind. I really would like to find a female vocalist to work with. Any tips on how to go about that, haha. Oh and “The Archer”, amazing song, one of my favorites from her easily. Do you do a lot of production work?
I'm just an enthusiastic lover of all kinds of music, songwriting hobbyist and long time Tape Op reader, which is an amazing resource for these kinds production ideas (and it is a totally free subscription!). Unfortunately, I'm not much of a musicians so while I can come up with plenty of interesting ideas, I can't really execute them. I would love to take on more of a "producer role," for lack of better words, but I'd also hate to take up someone's time and end up with something lackluster. Or even worse, something they hate. In the mean time, playing armchair producer anonymously on the internet will do.

As for finding a female lead, you could also hit up an open mic to see if there's any local talent. Or try YouTube maybe. Search for covers of songs with a similar vibe, find a voice you think will work for your tune and shoot them an email to see if they'd be down/have the ability for doing something with you remotely (assuming they aren't in your area). I'm sure like most of us, the person on the receiving end will be thrilled to have someone recognize their talent and would take the offer as a compliment. I've never taking this approach, but I don't see why it wouldn't work. If the first one says no, you still have 1,000s of other people to ask.


I'd be sure to ask them about their recording setup. I don't think they need to have a super-pro studio, just so long as they can deliver a clean stem (or a few so you have some flexibility) of just the vocal for you to add effects to and mix in.
Old 6th June 2020
  #9707
Gear Head
 
BlackwingGabriel's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by bkbirge View Post
Not bad, Not usually the kind of stuff I listen to but it's done well. I like the lead vocals approach, perhaps the performance could be tightened up a little, made a bit more emotive. Nice contrasts in the sections. I might back off the distortion amount on the guitar, let some pick attack come through, it kind of has a washed out sound without much definition, though full disclosure I'm listening on my laptop so undoubtedly missing subtleties. I think if you spent as much time on the vocal arrangement as you did on the instruments you could take this to another level. Good demo of a song that has potential in my opinion!
Thanks bkbirge! Well noted on vocals, Rolavine also point the same thing. However still not able to arrange and record more vocals as I had planned.

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Noodlist View Post
I like the sound of this, the vocals seem to be overpowered. I got a Smashing Pumpkins kind of vibe from this genre wise.
Thanks Noodlist! Ah more critique on the vocals. Noted. And yes! As a matter of fact, I do listen to a lot of Smashing Pumpkins! Perhaps unconsciously the writing flow just took me there.
Old 6th June 2020
  #9708
Lives for gear
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anthony Quinn View Post
So here are some examples of some small spots:

.27 - .28 The bass goes down and guitar should follow prob

.41 - .44 Guitar should prob try to match the changes

.56 - .59 Same

It's that going on throughout the track.

But to me, the main issue is it is stealing a lot of energy from the strength of your changes from 1.23 - 1.53

And then the guitar solos for a few bars but doesn't really outline the song.

You have such a great harmonic structure going in my opinion, but it isn't being derived or driven from this guitar, so I think it's getting too much focus unless it can also match the changes and harmonic structure, and kind of drive it.

I have to say this has been one of the most enjoyable tracks I've focused in on and critiqued in awhile. Great work.

Oh yeah, almost forgot to mention, I think transposing an audio region in the inspector is in fact the same as flexing, so I think it is the same even if you went in and tried to manually flex pitch. In this case, you probably are better off splitting the audio into new regions and flexing them through transpose in the inspector. That said I can't be certain how it will go.

I used flex to add a bit of swing (to match the track) to the guitar, then bounced it down. I then tried to add flex pitch so I could go get the guitar to follow the progression but I simply can't do it. Logic (Pitch flex) is making it just sound awful. I really need someone to play the part I think.
Old 7th June 2020
  #9709
Gear Nut
 
Anthony Quinn's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr Funk View Post
I used flex to add a bit of swing (to match the track) to the guitar, then bounced it down. I then tried to add flex pitch so I could go get the guitar to follow the progression but I simply can't do it. Logic (Pitch flex) is making it just sound awful. I really need someone to play the part I think.
Dang, I wish that could've worked out. Yeah, I think the flex pitch is usually sketchy in my opinion except for just doing region transposing, but even then it will still have a "sound", as it seems almost every pitching algo has a "sound".

I hope you find someone who can do it justice.
Old 8th June 2020
  #9710
Gear Addict
Simple one take one mic of one of my newest songs, live in studio.
This song just jumped out about a month ago when I put myself in my perceived head space of I've Got Worms, who posts songs here once and a while.
He will probably hate it, lol!
This is pretty much just as I would do the song live just me and my guitar. I put a few effects on it, but not much.

Songs of the Lord, Rocky Lavine 5/2020

Old tired songs
of old tired chords
I don’t know why
I’m not yet bored

But I expect to get an answer
when I hear the songs
of the lord
A{
I might have heard them
in a Chopin Polonaise
a Beethoven Symphony
or Dylan in his younger days

but the maker of music is bound
to know some inside tricks

So I’m reserving my judgment
until I hear them celestial licks

but I admit to being saved
by a certain song at a certain time

makes me think
I’ve been listening to the songs of the lord
for quite some time}


When a song like this comes in
fully formed from outer space
realize I’m just a conduit
with a guitar and a face
I stand on the shoulders of giants
whom I can’t help but venerate
Lau Tsu said that would make me helpless
but so far it’s only made me late ‘ 2nd vocal part not in recording ‘dodge that flaming sword
I think that everything must be the song of the lord

repeat a{}



Last edited by Rolavine; 8th June 2020 at 10:49 PM.. Reason: Lyrics changed.
Old 8th June 2020
  #9711
Me playing the 1st Short part of a piano piece I’m working on. This one is kinda cinematic sounding.
https://youtu.be/uc2_OKrHny8
Thanks.
Old 9th June 2020
  #9712
Lives for gear
 
Kronos147's Avatar
This is one I started last night in response to the Michigan Floods.

"When the Dam Bursts"

Forgive my voice

Old 9th June 2020
  #9713
Lives for gear
 

Not sure what you guys consider rough but here is a demo I released. I’m putting a record together to go pitch songs so I don’t think I should be releasing these demos but to keep the singer on board I am.

Manley ref c - vintech X73i - 1176. Kemper Amps. Superior drummer 3. I played everything.





https://youtu.be/sw-wn14ma2c
Old 9th June 2020
  #9714
This is a rough pop ballad I’ve been writing. I feel I need to change up the kick pattern in the chorus and add some ear candy in the bridge .

https://soundcloud.com/scottyjneilso.../s-3V1n0rn5Zd4
Old 9th June 2020
  #9715
Gear Head
 

I wasn't able to understand most of the lyrics because they seemed a little low(level), I know its a rough mix, just trying to decipher the lyrics.

I would like to hear the passage "I can almost see..." and the next few lines repeated. Maybe bring it forward by soloing the vocal for that line. That was the catchiest part of the song for me. I would repeat/utilize that part more.
Maybe don't throw everything in during the first chorus, hold something back for the big finish later. Maybe even cut out the autotune for the last chorus and let it really ring out.

Just some ideas. Keep it up.
Old 9th June 2020
  #9716
Gear Head
 

Here is a rough mix of a song I'm working on.
By working on I mean waiting for the drums to be delivered.

https://soundcloud.com/manofreason/a.../s-w7FGrA1ldVu

I like the stripped down feel it has so I'm hesitant to add much more, but I feel that maybe something is needed to enhance the last verse. Your thoughts?
Old 9th June 2020
  #9717
Thanks man I appreciate the feedback. I like that idea of the holding something back . I’m gonna try that and also bring up the vocals. I plan to also eq our son the the conflicting synth frequencies that exist for the vocals to sit better and stack the vox more to bring them forward
Old 9th June 2020
  #9718
Gear Addict
Quote:
Originally Posted by Neurojazz View Post
Me playing the 1st Short part of a piano piece I’m working on. This one is kinda cinematic sounding.
https://youtu.be/uc2_OKrHny8
Thanks.
Nice, music good, can you fix the camera better so it doesn't shake around so much? I liked the angle.
Old 9th June 2020
  #9719
Gear Addict
Quote:
Originally Posted by cap217 View Post
Not sure what you guys consider rough but here is a demo I released. I’m putting a record together to go pitch songs so I don’t think I should be releasing these demos but to keep the singer on board I am.

Manley ref c - vintech X73i - 1176. Kemper Amps. Superior drummer 3. I played everything.





https://youtu.be/sw-wn14ma2c
It's pretty good, I think taking the vocals up a bit would help. The banjo is pretty good but not perfect. If you played all that you have a lot of talent. The singer has a good country voice, but didn't really connect the lyrics to the audience the way a great country singer does, he seemed a bit detached, and since this isn't angst filled teenage music that won't work. You didn't post lyrics, like most of the COWARDS, but the song seemed pretty derivative of a derivative of a derivative and I'm not sure how long that progression can ride.

Great effort though and I enjoyed it.
Say do they have superior lap steel out yet!
Old 9th June 2020
  #9720
Gear Addict
Quote:
Originally Posted by ejanuska View Post
Here is a rough mix of a song I'm working on.
By working on I mean waiting for the drums to be delivered.

https://soundcloud.com/manofreason/a.../s-w7FGrA1ldVu

I like the stripped down feel it has so I'm hesitant to add much more, but I feel that maybe something is needed to enhance the last verse. Your thoughts?
Well I'm in favor of songs that say something and yours says I went in the Marines only normal basic training happened and now I'm a patriot. I kept expecting more.
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