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Old 15th June 2020
  #9830
Gear Addict
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by MyHatGuy View Post
Did you intend it to have the strange timing variations it has? It has some good lyrics, I like the Spanish though I can't help you with that, and wonder if it would be better to just sing your English phrases or sing the English with, as you cut off a lot of folks, including myself, who won't get the best part of the song, the differing opinions of her. At times the music seems inappropriate for the subject too, like you just sort of slapped it together and started embedding the lyrics. It's got potential.
Thanks for giving it a listen. I'm starting to think I dumped most of the drums because they weren't with the "groove," which might explain some of the timing issues. Since I plan to rerecord all the parts, especially my ham-handed piano playing, consider this more a proof of concept. I also directly lifted the intro synth part from another song I was working on, so the timing is def a bit off there. Similar with the strings that follow.

The Spanish parts are me directly ripping off an idea from Dylan via Romance in Durango.

No llores, mi querida (don't cry my darling)
Dios nos vigila (God is watching over us)
Soon the horse will take us to Durango
Agarrame, mi vida (hold me, my love)
Soon the desert will be gone
Soon you will be dancing the fandango


As for the music not fitting the subject, that is very intentional. My goal here is for the listener to say, "oh that is nice," until they start to get the lyrics. Kind of like the theme song, actually most of the songs, on It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. Initially the first verse was supposed to set the scene of her turning a trick and started:
Deadbolt click clacks
It erects as she genuflects
Then its bed to backs
Handful of dollars for willful neglect
As Malin opens the door a crack

I couldn't get those lyrics to work out, probably because they are pretty half baked. As it stands, I feel the first verse is almost a throw away. Like I said, a good rewrite is in order for the lyrics.[/QUOTE]

OK, I love that Dylan tune, but the Spanish lines are not critical to getting what that song is about, it could have been la la la, while you are using the Spanish Lines to define the limits of your character as seen by others young and old so it's part of your character sketch.

And the nice - "wait a minute" on the music worked for me.