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They say, you cannot polish a turd... Effects Pedals, Units & Accessories
Old 30th May 2017
  #1
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Remoteness's Avatar
Cool They say, you cannot polish a turd...

They say, you cannot polish a turd. I say, yes you can. You must freeze dry the turd first, then you can start the polishing process. If you want the turd to continue to shimmer and shine, it's all about refrigeration from that point forward. ~Steve Remote
Old 30th May 2017
  #2
Maybe not "polish," but a good coat of shellac will do the same thing.
Old 30th May 2017
  #3
Gear Guru
 
Brent Hahn's Avatar
 

Polishing = friction.
Friction = heat.
Heat + turd = ...?

It's not that you can't, it's that you shouldn't.
Old 30th May 2017
  #4
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mbvoxx's Avatar
Sure you can!

Dr. Guff's Products
Old 30th May 2017
  #5
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esldude's Avatar
 

Exactly what is the point of this thread? And from a super moderator?? Is gearslutz in need of some click bait or something??? I guess I just step into one.

Old 30th May 2017
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by esldude View Post
Exactly what is the point of this thread? And from a super moderator?? Is gearslutz in need of some click bait or something??? I guess I just step into one.

Perhaps this will clear things up:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humour
Old 30th May 2017
  #7
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AuldLangSine's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by esldude View Post
Exactly what is the point of this thread? And from a super moderator?? Is gearslutz in need of some click bait or something??? I guess I just step into one.

This must be a viral advertising campaign for a new Roland product.

Roland is about to "release" the new Roland Turd Polisher?
Old 30th May 2017
  #8
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If the original statement were really true, then I would have no post-prod business at all....
Old 31st May 2017
  #9
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esldude's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by AuldLangSine View Post
This must be a viral advertising campaign for a new Roland product.

Roland is about to "release" the new Roland Turd Polisher?
You think it will be the new Roland model TP 1 or would that confuse the issue with TP in the name?
Old 31st May 2017
  #10
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Tommy-boy's Avatar
 

In the studio, Autotune and Melodyne have been used to polish many turds. Question is, what do remotesters use to polish turds? This could be an interesting discussion.

Tom
Old 31st May 2017
  #11
These should put am end to all those problems The World’s Five Most Advanced Toilets and flush it right down the drain...<GRIN>
Old 31st May 2017
  #12
RPC
Gear Addict
 

To Tommy-boy: close-miking plus a good convolution reverb and a little compression do wonders for bad halls. I generally don't do much about bad musicians, since I do live work and there's no other take to choose!
Old 31st May 2017
  #13
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Brent Hahn's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by RPC View Post
I generally don't do much about bad musicians, since I do live work and there's no other take to choose!
I do a weekly live-in-studio webcast, and I learned right away to record everything -- soundcheck, rehearsal, all of it. The live show might go out with a few warts, but if there's anything I can do to clean up the archive version, I'll do it or at least jump in and try. I learn a lot by trying.
Old 1st June 2017
  #14
Super Moderator
 
Remoteness's Avatar
I don't know, perhaps the quality of being amusing which may add a quick comical aspect to this forum comes to mind.

If you dislike this forum or how I run it, you could go elsewhere or even start your own audio blog. Don't let me jam you up with all sorts of comic relief and such.

IMHO, this forum brings together a wide variety of individuals that create great (and not so great) discussions with a relatively high signal-to-noise ratio. I find this refreshing; many people do.

That said, sometimes you may find a thread may not interest you; this doesn't mean you should address your concerns to me in that manner, especially while hide your true identity when doing so.

We are only as good as the members we keep here on the "Remote Possibilities..." forum.

Let us keep the (relatively) high signal-to-noise ratio to a minimum. It's a win win for all of us.



Quote:
Originally Posted by esldude View Post
Exactly what is the point of this thread? And from a super moderator?? Is gearslutz in need of some click bait or something??? I guess I just step into one.

Old 1st June 2017
  #15
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esldude's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Remoteness View Post
I don't know, perhaps the quality of being amusing which may add a quick comical aspect to this forum comes to mind.

If you dislike this forum or how I run it, you could go elsewhere or even start your own audio blog. Don't let me jam you up with all sorts of comic relief and such.

IMHO, this forum brings together a wide variety of individuals that create great (and not so great) discussions with a relatively high signal-to-noise ratio. I find this refreshing; many people do.

That said, sometimes you may find a thread may not interest you; this doesn't mean you should address your concerns to me in that manner, especially while hide your true identity when doing so.

We are only as good as the members we keep here on the "Remote Possibilities..." forum.

Let us keep the (relatively) high signal-to-noise ratio to a minimum. It's a win win for all of us.
If this is comedy it was in poor taste in my opinion.

Your forum no question. If I didn't find it valuable I wouldn't be here.

An awfully strange thread to imply that I am bringing down the signal to noise ratio.
Old 1st June 2017
  #16
Super Moderator
 
Remoteness's Avatar
I'm here doing my best to please our community at large. If you don't like a thread, don't read it. People that know me personally know exactly where I'm coming from. If you feel I post threads in poor taste consider blocking me.

Furthermore, where exactly did I say you're bringing down the signal to noise ratio?

Keep in mind, you have replied three times to date to a thread that you find in poor taste and awfully strange.

We have a wonderful forum here and we should all be proud of it. I consider you part of that dynamic.



Quote:
Originally Posted by esldude View Post
If this is comedy it was in poor taste in my opinion.

Your forum no question. If I didn't find it valuable I wouldn't be here.

An awfully strange thread to imply that I am bringing down the signal to noise ratio.
Old 1st June 2017
  #17
Quote:
Originally Posted by esldude View Post
If this is comedy it was in poor taste in my opinion.

Your forum no question. If I didn't find it valuable I wouldn't be here.

An awfully strange thread to imply that I am bringing down the signal to noise ratio.


I sure hope a thread about s&%t would taste poor.

The implications are the reverse I think. Better to consolidate the poor signal to noise ratio in this one thread, rather than have it spread throughout the rest of the forum.
Old 1st June 2017
  #18
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Muser's Avatar
Old 1st June 2017
  #19
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Remoteness's Avatar
"Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens.” ~Khalil Gibran



Quote:
Originally Posted by esldude View Post
If this is comedy it was in poor taste in my opinion.

Your forum no question. If I didn't find it valuable I wouldn't be here.

An awfully strange thread to imply that I am bringing down the signal to noise ratio.
Old 1st June 2017
  #20
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Lenzo's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muser View Post
Sometimes I wake up in the morning and scan through these threads as I'm eating breakfast. I'm glad I skipped breakfast this morning. And on another note...I can't help but wonder if the op is speaking of polishing his own turds or someone else's.
L.
Old 1st June 2017
  #21
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Muser's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lenzo View Post
Sometimes I wake up in the morning and scan through these threads as I'm eating breakfast. I'm glad I skipped breakfast this morning. And on another note...I can't help but wonder if the op is speaking of polishing his own turds or someone else's.
L.
no idea but Dr No Effects are Effects which integrate all these theories into a single pedal.
Old 1st June 2017
  #22
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Humor of any kind is in short supply in this world anymore, especially on the web. Any attempts that don't involve ad hominem political rants are very welcome. Do carry on.
Old 1st June 2017
  #23
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boojum's Avatar
My overall take on this forum is that I am very lucky to have found it. There is a collegiality and sharing here not found on other forums. Also there are some really heavy hitters on this board who kindly put up with me and the other amateurs who are striving to be better. I have said this so many times and will say it again: this is my master class on recording.

The forum is not a perfect place. There will always be a very small minority who disturb. And they may not be the same as those who disturb others. What is really important is how valuable this forum is. And the gentle guidance we get from Steve Remote. He does not take the "Dear Leader" approach.
Old 2nd June 2017
  #24
Super Moderator
 
Remoteness's Avatar
True story, brother boojum!



Quote:
Originally Posted by boojum View Post
My overall take on this forum is that I am very lucky to have found it. There is a collegiality and sharing here not found on other forums. Also there are some really heavy hitters on this board who kindly put up with me and the other amateurs who are striving to be better. I have said this so many times and will say it again: this is my master class on recording.

The forum is not a perfect place. There will always be a very small minority who disturb. And they may not be the same as those who disturb others. What is really important is how valuable this forum is. And the gentle guidance we get from Steve Remote. He does not take the "Dear Leader" approach.
Old 3rd June 2017
  #25
Gear Guru
 
John Willett's Avatar
 

Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Remoteness View Post
They say, you cannot polish a turd. I say, yes you can. You must freeze dry the turd first, then you can start the polishing process. If you want the turd to continue to shimmer and shine, it's all about refrigeration from that point forward. ~Steve Remote
But all you end up with is shiny sh!t
Old 3rd June 2017
  #26
Where is the moderator when you really need him? <GRIN>

GREAT FORUM - EQUALLY GREAT MODERATOR My favorite forum on GS!
Old 3rd June 2017
  #27
Super Moderator
 
Remoteness's Avatar
True story!

Quote:
Originally Posted by John Willett View Post
But all you end up with is shiny sh!t
Old 3rd June 2017
  #28
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AudioWonderland's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Remoteness View Post
They say, you cannot polish a turd. I say, yes you can. You must freeze dry the turd first, then you can start the polishing process. If you want the turd to continue to shimmer and shine, it's all about refrigeration from that point forward. ~Steve Remote
No one says you can't polish a turd. They say that it will still be a turd once polished...
Old 3rd June 2017
  #29
Once polished, twice shy, babe...
Old 3rd June 2017
  #30
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boojum's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by joelpatterson View Post
Once polished, twice shy, babe...
Joel, Joel, Joel, hang your head in shame.
Topic:
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