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They say, you cannot polish a turd... Effects Pedals, Units & Accessories
Old 4th June 2017
  #31
Mythbusters busted this in one of their episodes. They found that you could take a turd and polish it to achieve orders of magnitude improvement in reflectivity.
Old 4th June 2017
  #32
Quote:
Originally Posted by boojum View Post
Joel, Joel, Joel, hang your head in shame.
I am seriously considering this... especially when I realize that the real, creative way to recycle the hoary old cliche I reference is to say,

"Once Britain, twice shy"

which is ever so much cleverer, flows better, and generally is the superior reworking, although unfortunately it has nothing to do with the conversation at hand.

Last edited by joelpatterson; 5th June 2017 at 02:06 AM..
Old 4th June 2017
  #33
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mbvoxx's Avatar
Ha....The old "lipstick on a pig" scenario with a different name!
I polished many turds during my post production years and some of them actually blossomed into mere farts.

Remember; Every sale is just a "Red Tag Sale" with a different name!
Old 4th June 2017
  #34
Lives for gear
 

I've polished lots of turds...

Old 4th June 2017
  #35
Lives for gear
 

Quote:

Douglas began hanging out with Lennon and his wife, Yoko Ono. He helped produce some of Ono's music, heavy on experimentation.

That's putting it kindly. The strangest moment involved a track called Dead Rat. In the middle of the song, Ono left a 20-second gap. "I had a bad feeling about that hole -- I kept thinking of it as the dead rat solo," he says.

Sure enough, he recalls, when all the tracks were cut, Ono's assistant showed up with a shoe box. Inside was a dead rat. Ono wanted it incorporated in the recording. So Douglas had his assistant place it on a stool and set up an expensive mike inches away.

"Yoko wanders in like nothing, and says, "I see you have the rat ready to go -- let's get right to it,"' he says. "When the 20-second dead spot comes, I push up the fader. I'm listening. There's no noise, and I stop tape, and say to Yoko, "It's not quite right, is it?' And she says, "No, Jack, there's something wrong.' "

Douglas had his assistant, stifling laughter, move the mike closer to the rat. "We do it again. I push the fader up, this time with a little smile and I say, "I think that's much better.' And she says, "That's a take.'
Hilarious.
Old 4th June 2017
  #36
Gear Guru
 
Brent Hahn's Avatar
 

I used to be friendly with a well known NYC guitarist who spent a couple weeks shuttling back and forth between Steely Dan and Yoko sessions. That had to have been odd.
Old 4th June 2017
  #37
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brent Hahn View Post
I used to be friendly with a well known NYC guitarist who spent a couple weeks shuttling back and forth between Steely Dan and Yoko sessions. That had to have been odd.
Man, that would have made my head explode.
Old 4th June 2017
  #38
Gear Guru
 
Brent Hahn's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by TMetzinger View Post
Man, that would have made my head explode.
The extra layer of weird was that this was when players were beginning to figure out that the fact that you played on a Steely Dan session (er even several) was no guarantee you'd be on the record. And this guy, as it turned out, wasn't.

Another fun factoid is that he was pretty sure one of the songs he played on was the one that got accidentally erased by a tech.
Old 7th June 2017
  #39
Gear Maniac
 

No you can't polish one, but you can cover it in glitter.

It's often done that way in post production.
Old 8th June 2017
  #40
Gear Guru
 
John Willett's Avatar
 

Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Geoff Poulton View Post
No you can't polish one, but you can cover it in glitter.

It's often done that way in post production.
Old 8th June 2017
  #41
0VU
Gear Addict
 

If the glitter doesnt work you can always stick it in a bun and call it a hot dog.
Old 19th December 2017
  #42
Gear Maniac
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by 0VU View Post
If the glitter doesnt work you can always stick it in a bun and call it a hot dog.
Something to relish eh!?
Old 20th December 2017
  #43
Lives for gear
 

My question is: How can you pick it up from the clean end, as the politically correct crowd would have us believe they can do?
Hugh
Old 20th December 2017
  #44
Lives for gear
use one of those 'responsible dog owners in public' bags....
Old 20th December 2017
  #45
Gear Guru
 
Brent Hahn's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by hughshouse View Post
My question is: How can you pick it up from the clean end, as the politically correct crowd would have us believe they can do?
Hugh
A turd has a clean end? Heck, the dog it came from doesn't have a clean end.
Old 21st December 2017
  #46
If Pentatonix is any indication, you can compress a turd into a diamond.
Old 9th January 2018
  #47
Super Moderator
 
Remoteness's Avatar
Yes, depending on the quality of the turd.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rumleymusic View Post
If Pentatonix is any indication, you can compress a turd into a diamond.
Old 10th January 2018
  #48
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vincentvangogo's Avatar
 

You can, but you may have to wait a while.



(Coprolite aka Fossilized dinosaur sh*t.)
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