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Music is ruining my life
Old 8th March 2018
  #1
Deleted 47d171f 
Guest
Music is ruining my life

I remember back in 1990. When I recorded to tape. Things were good. Beautiful. There were feelings to my words.

After 14 years of music jamming, it is all work. all pain. I feel an electric current inside my body. all stress. all work.

There are no emotions only work and pain.


I really want to stop making music, but somehow I can`t. It is like someone is torturing me.

All work.

Some months ago I felt the electric fear current inside me really strong. It was so strong the dinner plate ended up getting electrocuted in the micro/tin foil. It is what it causes for me.

It is horror. I feel this alien gas on me. electric. horror. I have to stop making music.

I have now been jamming 14 years all day with no meaning.

Need some advice or words
Old 8th March 2018
  #2
Deleted 47d171f 
Guest
UPDATE


I just deleted all my Cubase files 100gb

I can see my whole head is hung up focused on the computer. I feel so much better.
Old 8th March 2018
  #3
Lives for gear
 
boombapdame's Avatar
 

@ Deleted 47d171f how did you get to a point where music is painful? What's your story?
Old 8th March 2018
  #4
m03
Gear Maniac
 
m03's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deleted 47d171f View Post
UPDATE


I just deleted all my Cubase files 100gb

I can see my whole head is hung up focused on the computer. I feel so much better.
Didn't you already claim to have done that in a previous bizarre thread a few months ago?

Computer is dangerous
Old 20th March 2018
  #5
Gear Head
 

You sound like you need professional medical mental help. I hope you get it.
Old 3rd June 2018
  #6
I went through a weird phase like this. Just let out your madness. Try not to identify with it. Most of all, don’t project it on to people.

I haven’t seen a therapist but probably should have. Music isn’t ruining your life. It’s all the bs and conflicts coming to a head.

I’m not a doctor and this isn’t medical advice.
Old 19th June 2018
  #7
Gear Guru
 
Derp's Avatar
Focus your madness and find an outlet for it. A new way of doing music perhaps? Or start writing instead. You have a nice way with words. You should do that.
Old 8th July 2018
  #8
Lives for gear
 
mikefellh's Avatar
They say to make your hobby your career...but when you do that it becomes your job, and you need a release outlet when you're stressed.

I had photography as a hobby, but then got it as a job and it was no longer fun as a hobby. That's when I got back into music and into synths.
Old 8th July 2018
  #9
6 years working for a studio and I crossed paths with 70, 80, 100+ musicians a day... unhappiness really wasn't uncommon. For some people including the studio owner, it had long become 'just a job'. The owner specifically had found other creative outlets and other parts of life he preferred and enjoyed focusing on (like his kids for example). Work was just work. A way to fund existence. From others, there was a sense of something to prove at all costs. That included absolute misery. Then there were the happy go lucky bunch who just loved having a jam with some mates.

Perhaps the common denomination here isn't music, but isolation and poorly ordered priorities? Making music with people is so much more fun than making it alone on a computer. Why isn't fun the priority? It seems part of adulthood includes the conjuring of substantial obstacles in life, just so we can then find a solution...
Old 24th October 2018
  #10
Gear Nut
 
rezident's Avatar
Smile

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deleted 47d171f View Post
I remember back in 1990. When I recorded to tape. Things were good. Beautiful. There were feelings to my words.

After 14 years of music jamming, it is all work. all pain. I feel an electric current inside my body. all stress. all work.

There are no emotions only work and pain.


I really want to stop making music, but somehow I can`t. It is like someone is torturing me.

All work.

Some months ago I felt the electric fear current inside me really strong. It was so strong the dinner plate ended up getting electrocuted in the micro/tin foil. It is what it causes for me.

It is horror. I feel this alien gas on me. electric. horror. I have to stop making music.

I have now been jamming 14 years all day with no meaning.

Need some advice or words
You said that back in 1990 when you recorded to tape things were beautiful. So my advice to you is to acquire a tape machine that can make things beautiful again, and you will be happy.
Old 25th October 2018
  #11
Lives for gear
 
BarcelonaMusic's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deleted 47d171f View Post
UPDATE


I just deleted all my Cubase files 100gb

I can see my whole head is hung up focused on the computer. I feel so much better.
At least put in on Dropbox for Christ Sake. I`m 43 and still have tapes and tapes of recordings I`ve done when I was 16 years old. And I still reference those from time to time because it`s amazing to look inside your musical mind as a kid and realize how open, pure and creative you were at that age. It`s your own unique style far far away from everything you`ve been exposed to since. Your train of thought changes as you age and you just threw it all away. I still tap those lines sometimes almost 30 years later. Save EVERYTHING.
Old 25th October 2018
  #12
Lives for gear
Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainNovember7 View Post
I went through a weird phase like this. Just let out your madness. Try not to identify with it. Most of all, don’t project it on to people.

I haven’t seen a therapist but probably should have. Music isn’t ruining your life. It’s all the bs and conflicts coming to a head.

I’m not a doctor and this isn’t medical advice.


Old 25th October 2018
  #13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deleted 47d171f View Post
I remember back in 1990. When I recorded to tape. Things were good. Beautiful. There were feelings to my words.

After 14 years of music jamming, it is all work. all pain. I feel an electric current inside my body. all stress. all work.

There are no emotions only work and pain.


I really want to stop making music, but somehow I can`t. It is like someone is torturing me.

All work.

Some months ago I felt the electric fear current inside me really strong. It was so strong the dinner plate ended up getting electrocuted in the micro/tin foil. It is what it causes for me.

It is horror. I feel this alien gas on me. electric. horror. I have to stop making music.

I have now been jamming 14 years all day with no meaning.

Need some advice or words
Do you take drugs?
Old 1st November 2018
  #14
Lives for gear
 
Bob Ross's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by rezident View Post
You said that back in 1990 when you recorded to tape things were beautiful. So my advice to you is to acquire a time machine that can make things beautiful again, and you will be happy.
ftfy
Old 30th May 2019
  #15
Here for the gear
This is what I think composition, Melody & harmony & arrangement all that stuff requires a clear mind when you're actually doing the stuff.

Whereas writing lyrics & rhymes requires some kind of pre-disturbing inner conflict, you cannot write anything with a clear mind. Of course you need to be sane at the time of writing but you need some predisposed tension & uneasiness so that you can't help but write & get it out of you; so that when you actually are performing & delivering those lines you unknowingly imply all the adlibs, vocal inflections & nuances.

By the way all of this coming from a guy who's been into music for 4 years now so it might be trash too. I apologize if that's the case
Old 17th June 2019
  #16
Here for the gear
 
LineSicks's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by pranavakazack View Post
This is what I think composition, Melody & harmony & arrangement all that stuff requires a clear mind when you're actually doing the stuff.

Whereas writing lyrics & rhymes requires some kind of pre-disturbing inner conflict, you cannot write anything with a clear mind. Of course you need to be sane at the time of writing but you need some predisposed tension & uneasiness so that you can't help but write & get it out of you; so that when you actually are performing & delivering those lines you unknowingly imply all the adlibs, vocal inflections & nuances.

By the way all of this coming from a guy who's been into music for 4 years now so it might be trash too. I apologize if that's the case

Pretty insiteful for only 4-years in...
To be honest, I'd never thought about what makes one or the other 'work'... just grateful it did work, when it did. I never had a plan-B for when things went awry, or set way of approaching things in the first place. I mean, there's some preparation(a template! lol), but really... life moves pretty quickly, so if I get a chance to record with a band member that's in town, I try to accommodate them. That doesn't always mean I'll be in the right frame of mind to do it... but it gets done somehow.

Definitely not trash... got me thinking, anyway.

Edit: BTW, this has to be one of the most depressing original topics I've ever read... 14 years... all day... no meaning? C'mon! There's not a song in that???
Old 18th June 2019
  #17
Lives for gear
Sorry your life sucks. Mine does not.

Old 23rd June 2019
  #18
Lives for gear
Old 26th August 2019
  #19
Here for the gear
 

you sound ready to start making emo music.
Old 27th August 2019
  #20
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