All Advertisers
| All Advertisers |
| |||||||
Similar Threads | ||||
| Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
| Stupidest thing YOU've done in a session | aevan | High end | 270 | 8th November 2008 03:49 AM |
| Stupidest things WE'VE ever done durring a session | SiliconAudioLab | High end | 79 | 12th August 2008 06:54 AM |
| funny things said in today's session | knerd | The moan zone | 6 | 7th March 2007 01:20 PM |
| Stupidest Thing Created in a Studio | minister | High end | 18 | 25th January 2007 02:25 AM |
| Ever heard of a Reason file over writing a Protools session file? | Autowow | Music computers | 9 | 22nd July 2005 08:37 AM |
 |
| | Thread Tools | Search this Thread | Rating:  | Display Modes |
17th January 2005, 10:48 PM
| #1 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: westland, michigan
Posts: 1,285
| stupidest things you have ever heard during a session. ok, im curious,since i have a few good ones of my own,i know you all have many many more. what is the stupidest thing you have ever heard a "client" say during a session??? one time i was getting ready to track a glam band and the singer introduced himself to me as "devon childs". than he went on to explain that it means "devils child"....pretty dumb. |
|  |
|
17th January 2005, 11:50 PM
| #2 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Midland TX
Posts: 1,079
| My favorite: A 'singer' asked me once if she had to pay for the time it took to track several takes of the same passage because she was flatter than three day old beer...flat beyond autotune's ability to fix... Another: (actual conversation!) Me: "What's the matter, singer?" Vox: "I can't hear any playback or my voice" Me: "Put the headphones on" Vox: "Yeah...that's better" 
__________________ Ken Morgan Wireline Studio Midland, TX Don't Blame Me, I Just Recorded What You Played |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 12:14 AM
| #3 |
| Gear Head  Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: New York City
Posts: 53
 | This Song's a Hit!
__________________ Think big, think positive, never show any sign of weakness. Buy low, sell high. Fear? That's the other guy's problem. |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 12:54 AM
| #4 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Sudbury, On. Canada
Posts: 1,686
| Man, I haven't played drums in almost like two years!!!  That was scarry, and it sounded like crap too. Jason
__________________ most important gear I own are my ears! visit my band www.apparatusmusic.com www.myspace.com/apparatusnumetal |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 01:31 AM
| #5 |
| Gear addict  Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: LA
Posts: 342
| The stupidest thing I've heard in a tracking session: "You were flat and way out of pocket on that last phrase, let's punch there." "No let's move on, that's my style." The stupidest thing I've heard in a mix session: "Can you make the guitars a more greenish glow."  And the stupidest thing I've heard in a mastering session: "Can you put more space between the songs to give me time to adjust the tone controls on the stereo." |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 01:37 AM
| #6 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: steeltown
Posts: 1,735
 | One of the funniest (read - stupidest!): "We're gonna be rich!" but the best is: can you (auto)tune that out of tune (rhythm) guitar part, it's starting (after 3 days of not wanting to retrack it - in tune!?) to bother me... Trying to deal with a drummer that speeds up thru every drum fill - "maybe lessen up on the fills this time" response: "that's my strength. man!" Over to you...
__________________ Jay PlugHead Productions |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 01:44 AM
| #7 |
| Gear addict Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 497
| I always get a kick out of hearing someones head knock against the angled glass between the control room and studio. The only thing better than that is the dumb, confused look on their face. Priceless.
__________________ "Fix it in the marketing" |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 01:45 AM
| #8 |
| Gear addict  Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 403
| CBC radio broadcast engineer while miking up the drum kit for a " Cardigans" live broadcast ( they were the opener ) right before thier first single was breaking in Canada Drummer " hey man, what are you doing with all the mics?!?!" AE " gettign the kit miced up.." Drummer " no dude, I just use one SM57 over the kit... get rid of all those" AE " what?! " Drummer " Seriously man, THATS MY SOUND" AE " well, D U D E, your sound sucks." lol
__________________ But, whatever you do, don't go with cheap XFMRs, you may have to use them someday. - Remoteness |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 01:50 AM
| #9 |
| Gear addict Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 497
| Musician after his take: "I think it's shit, what do you think?" --- Engineer: "The project will cost $3600" Prospective client: "Would you take $3000" Engineer: "Do you have $3000" Prospective client: "No".
__________________ "Fix it in the marketing" |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 02:09 AM
| #10 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Scotland UK
Posts: 707
| singer listening to mix playback..... "....can anyone hear chickens...." he was serious!!!!! We found them....anyone guess what it was? |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 02:14 AM
| #11 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Chicago
Posts: 1,460
| chickens?
__________________ She's tidied up and I can't find anything |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 05:37 AM
| #12 |
| Gear maniac Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 201
| I often hear voices in solo'd overheads. I just ignore them now but I still hear them. They don't say anything but they are there mumbling away. I think I know what it is. I think it's the heads reforming after the initial impact but it sure sounds like voices. wm. |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 05:44 AM
| #13 |
| Lives for gear Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 680
| Two stories of local legend in which I was unfortunately not involved: Producer: "What's that hi-pitched tinny thing?" Engineer: "What? Where?" Producer: "Right there!" Engineer begins soloing tracks. Producer: "There! That's it!" Engineer: "That's a hi hat, Nick.' Also, from notoriously difficult female singer: "I have GOT to have more SMPTE in the headphones?" Needless to say, this engineer gave it to her LOUD AND CLEAR before pressing play again. Chris Garges Charlotte, NC |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 06:00 AM
| #14 | |
| Lives for gear Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 832
| Quote:
I truely enjoyed those quotes-they were Fantastic! ....  ROFL More please! Brad
__________________ TransAudio Group | |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 06:42 AM
| #15 |
| Lives for gear Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 832
| OK< got me thinking. Heres' just a couple from some "almost" customers: "I want to buy an E47 but I want it to sound like an ELUX251. What Soundelux mic should I get?" "I thought the ATC's were great but everything sounds way too clear on them." Brad
__________________ TransAudio Group |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 06:45 AM
| #16 |
| Gear maniac  Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Tx.
Posts: 159
| "Do you really know what all these knobs do ??? " |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 07:22 AM
| #17 | |
| Guest
Posts: n/a
| Quote:
| |
| |
|
18th January 2005, 07:46 AM
| #18 |
| Lives for gear Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Vancouver
Posts: 634
| The singer (whom just couldnt sing and was way way off key) comes into the control room and listens to his take. Singer says, "I dont sound like that. There is something wrong with your equipment. Something's gotta be broken or somethin"  (he was dead serious and started to argue about it)(Sorry bud but what goes into that mic comes outta those monitors. Keep your day job)  Shane |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 07:52 AM
| #19 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Bloomington Il
Posts: 3,600
| My favorite one is to me talking to a guitar player that I referred to as "Noodles" because he noodled over everything. He plays a Strat... Me: Try it with the neck pick-up please Noodles: ...blank stare... Me: Try the neck pick-up I think it will blend well on this song Noodles: ...Huh? Me: Switch to the neck pick-up please. Noodles: I have no idea what you mean. Me: See these things here, those are you pick-ups, I'd like to hear this one (as I touch the neck pick-up). Noodles: ...blank stare... Me: This switch changes which pick-up is being used...(Then I explained ---very slowly---how a Strat pick-up switch works) Noodles: I thought that switched the strings. Me: ...blank stare... RUNNER UP: Drummer after soundcheck playback Drummer: I don't like that kick drum sound. Me: OK, what type of tone do you want? Drummer: I don't want to answer that.
__________________ Tony Oxide Lounge Recording See the Oxide Lounge! WWJMD? Come see me on the Tape Op boards! "If I have to flip flop more than three times in an A/B test to figure out what the difference is, I lose interest in that difference.'--Tchad Blake |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 09:12 AM
| #20 | |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Portsmouth, UK
Posts: 1,455
| Quote:
(Cocks his shotgun) "Get running boy!" | |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 10:29 AM
| #21 |
| Gear interested Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: mid Atlantic
Posts: 25
| Back in the good 'ol days when 24tk analogue was a luxury and most of us were working on 16tk, I remember a session where all 16 tracks were absolutely full up. Chock a block. The Producer turns to the engineer and asks to set up for yet another overdub. The engineer says that all tracks are full up and there is no room. A crisp Ģ20 note is waved in engineers face with the words: "I'm sure there's something you can do..." I do remember a certain famous guitarist wanting the Studer A800 pulled right up to the SSL to .... "cut down on the signal path as now the sound has less distance to travel". Obviously he'd never tried to move one before.  |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 11:20 AM
| #22 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: LONDON
Posts: 642
| Funny, stupid or scary? One of the most famous musicans in the world: " Let's just bung it down onto tape" One of the most revered engineers in the world: " Ok" (to assistant) "Line up the 2" please" Assistant at one of the most famous studios in the world " What? We dont use tape" Revered Engineer "Well F*&k give me a screwdriver I'll do it myself" Assistant "We don't keep screwdrivers in the studio, they are downstairs and the bloke won't be back for an hour" All "F*&k !!!!" Later the same assistant told me that connecting the word clock cables from my master clock generator to my multiple converters would have no affect on the sound. Christ this guy works in the one studio in the world your granny could name! |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 11:20 AM
| #23 |
| Lives for gear Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: westland, michigan
Posts: 1,285
| i was mixing a song and the singer told me he wanted me to make the track "sound like sex". does anyone have any idea what piece of gear does that? |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 11:50 AM
| #24 | |
| Lives for gear Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Portsmouth, UK
Posts: 1,455
| Quote:
| |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 12:00 PM
| #25 |
| Gearslutz.com admin  Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: London, UK
Posts: 11,813
| Gilrfriend of a heavy rock band that had Scott Goram from Thin Lizzy guesting on gtr for their album.. Scott - playing solos in control room, everybody excited Girl - chatting very loudly over the music to friend Everybody - "shut the f**k up!" Girl - pointing finger at Scott, who's cab is mic'ed up in another room - "what's the big deal? - he's only miming!" Sweden (Trance Dance singer 1980's) "Can you raise my ears"
__________________ Jules "...there are some amazing deals to be had in this right now. it brings battleship mixing closer to the jilted generation"  - reptil |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 12:53 PM
| #26 | |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Berlin / Germany
Posts: 5,066
| Quote:
 Here is one, maybe not that funny, but it was sort of interesting to me. Imagine a guy that you thought to be not that bad as the second guitarist on a Spanish duo and whom you invited to track him for nada, so that you might get something other than your own chit for a studio demo and him to get a couple of good sounding demos for himself. So, the guy comes over days later and you two first drink a cup of coffee together, talking about what to do. First thing he makes clear is that AE is secondary and that everything must be arranged to the artists convenience. Next you two go in the studio / living room and he wonders whether boutique gear and SD mics could make a difference to the pocket size Fostex and 200$ AKG that he has at home. And when recognizing that you have prepared for tracking in the ( good sounding ) room, he asks repeatedly why not to track in the booth, so that you explain the same thing two, three times to him. Then he wants to record his own piece and none of the classical Spanish ones that you have heard him playing slick already. Heck, you agree. He takes his guitar and starts playing, you suggest to try one of your guitars instead cause his sounds like a piece of chipboard. He takes them, confirms how good they sound, but "I think mine suits better to the music" looking at your wondering face "we musicians know within seconds which instruments fits best for the music" ( knows that you play guitar too, but anyways, as "we musicians" says so ... ) Returned to his guitar he sits on the optimally positioned chair while you put the heads on for to position the mics. After about 3 minutes as youīre close to the best spot of the main mic he jumps up fretfully already. "I canīt sit that long, why does that take so long". You hurry up and sit behind the screen for a trial track. After he is through one time you ask "donīt you want to tune it at all?" He "Why? It sounds ok, doesnīt it?" Then he tries tuning for a second and goes on. You repeat "the guitar is still out of tune". He: "no, itīs fine". We track his awfully played piece 3 times before he jumps up again "Ok, I got to go now". And on his way out he mentions one more time something like "the musician is the most important one in the studio." The funny thing is that I set down afterwards EQing it and slicing that crap into pieces. After days it has indeed improved 300% and I send it together with the best of the original takes over to a friend of mine. He reflects like "You have done magic to the original sound, but the detuned guitar hurts my ears. And that playing ... Why do you waste your time with such a sh!t? Your own recordings sound so much better." I launch the tweaked example in MediaPlayer and compare it to some clips of my own and suddenly I donīt understand myself anymore. Why TF have I spend time with this!? Life is a msytery - As a teacher of another discipline I have experienced what the difference is when you instruct people for nada in contrast to when you cost them 50 bucks for 45 minutes. And when I was educated for that profession the assistents always used to remind us: "Never give lessons for free. People cannot appreciate the value and mobilize the adequate respect for the lesson that way." Why the hell are we so banal and predictable?  ( Hope it wonīt sound too bothered though. Actually Iīm in good mood.  )Ruphus
__________________ "Am I the only one that tires of this "everything is subjective" watered-down-pop-culture-pseudo-philosophy bullshit?" Bravin Neff Wolgang Burr, former office leader of the German Chancellor before committee of inquiry: "You would not believe what unusual happens daily." "Patience, young Skywalker - let the object of your desires come to you." JTR "All thinking men are atheists." Ernest Hemingway | |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 12:57 PM
| #27 | |
| 3 + infractions, membership under review with GS admin  Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Foxboro, MA USA
Posts: 5,783
| Quote:
__________________ [COLOR="White"][/COLOR] [SIZE="2"][b]Fletcher[/b][/SIZE] If you have a question please email me at [email]Fletcher@mercenary.com[/email] instead of using the PM system... I very rarely check that system and it could take a while to get a response. I can also be found at either address below: [size=2][url=http://recforums.prosoundweb.com][b]R/E/P[/b][/url][/size] the [b]R[/b]ecording [b]E[/b]ngineer and [b]P[/b]roducer forums [url=http://www.mercenary.com][b]Mercenary Audio[/b][/url] [size=1][b]mwagener wrote on Sat, 11 September 2004 14:33[/b] We are selling emotions, there are no emotions in a grid [b][url=http://www.ericambel.com/index.htm]Roscoe[/url] Ambel once said[/b]: Pro-Tools is to audio what fluorescent is to light[/size] | |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 01:12 PM
| #28 |
| Lives for gear  Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 1,117
| Stupidest things Ive seen, Bass player (holding a fretless) says to the guitar player, " watch me, Ill show you the riff" and this just yesterday Im tracking a 10 piece band with a brass section, I fill every available space with the rythm section and will later reset the main room for the brass section overdubs, Drummer says to me, "can we have guide brass" I almost wanted to have them stand around his kit pointing at him!! lol
__________________ Adam Calaitzis www.toyland.com.au |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 01:29 PM
| #29 |
| Gear addict Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: woodstock NY
Posts: 397
| back in the 2" days...once had a producer tell me to save some time " Let's wipe while we bounce"... the old timers should get it.... SP
__________________ www.scottpetitoproductions.com |
|
| |
|
18th January 2005, 01:45 PM
|
