Hey so sorry to derail the thread with my own problems
Lets talk about you.
I had this dumbarse alcoholic bf once when I was first getting into collecting vintage roland analog drum machines and cool vintage synths. He liked getting getting pissed on bourbon and then he'd wobble all about my studio, sloshing sticky liquid everywhere. That put my heart in my throat. So I tried to teach him cubase but he was, you know, an idiot. So then I got him into DJ'ing. That really solved the problem, with dumbing it all down to mixing just two sounds. He got ok at it too, so long as it was 4/4.
Anyway thats what I did, hope it helps.