The all time stupidest quotes thread!
Old 24th November 2010
  #1
Lives for gear
 
msl's Avatar
The all time stupidest quotes thread!

I think its time the EMI&EMP section had one of these, what with the deluge of seriously quality quotes lately!

EDIT: Please delete the name of the orginal poster when posting! Thank you.

I'll start the ball rolling...

Quote:
turns out it was much harder to rap out loud than it was to just rap inside of my head so it's too early to find a producer yet, I need to find a tutorial or something on how to rap
and an oldie but goodie

Quote:
I want to move some samples from one hard drive to another hard drive but i dont want to copy and paste because there is some loss in quality during that transition...



.
Old 24th November 2010
  #2
Lives for gear
Quote:
Originally Posted by ass****** View Post
the chorouses are a bit wierd they are suppose to sound like they are shouted out by a gang of black people but I couldn't find a filter for that.
Actually, the whole post is priceless:

Worlds illest rapper needs software advice yo
Old 24th November 2010
  #3
Lives for gear
 
alexp's Avatar
 

That thread had me in tears. And I had Tacos quote as a sig, until I got asked to remove it :(




alexP
Old 24th November 2010
  #4
Lives for gear
 
golden beers's Avatar
OP: dude i think this thread you started could be epic. I've often thought of starting a thread like this. i love the idea. the reason i didn't; it's not nice to call out other GS members for being ridiculously stoopid, or pathetic. and it can only lead to a tetchy flame party.
Old 24th November 2010
  #5
Lives for gear
 

Imo the quotes by ass******* transcended the boundaries of stupidity, they were (intentional) comic genius.

The real stupidity was in some of the replies particularly where he was being taken seriously.
Old 25th November 2010
  #6
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msl's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by golden beers View Post
OP: dude i think this thread you started could be epic. I've often thought of starting a thread like this. i love the idea. the reason i didn't; it's not nice to call out other GS members for being ridiculously stoopid, or pathetic. and it can only lead to a tetchy flame party.

Yeah I know your basically kinda right, well mostly. Maybe we let it die so. The real impetus was the ass****** quote, which is obviously trolling but so damn funny...

I wonder who ass****** is? Certainly the most entertaining thread in ages. Anyway no real way to delete threads (other than asking the mods), and not sure I really want too lets let the masses decide. If others think that too let me know and I'll ask for a delete.


.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #7
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msl's Avatar
Ah the classics keep coming...


Quote:
Because I do a lot of different voices on a commercial track. The instrumental changes around the middle and it takes the song to a whole other dimension. Never in the history of commercial electro-pop has there been such a piece like this. The song is also spiritual and never has there been used spirituality in commercial electro-pop with a concept of a tiger . I also used a metaphor so actually you could call this song a piece of musical electro poetry . It's something innovative and futuristic.

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Old 23rd February 2011
  #8
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lowkey's Avatar
 

perhaps it would preferable to leave out the quoted posters username in this thread? im sure alot of people have written something they later regret and really dont need brought back up in public again...
Old 23rd February 2011
  #9
Lives for gear
 

what about the infamous "so you have two oscillators and you de-tune them, then what?"
Old 23rd February 2011
  #10
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msl's Avatar
Quote:
perhaps it would preferable to leave out the quoted posters username in this thread? im sure alot of people have written something they later regret and really dont need brought back up in public again...

Good idea!



.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #11
Banned
 

I miss this guy on here. His matter-of-fact posts made me crack up and the fact that people actually looked up to him as a hero in his genre made me so disappointed in humanity.

Quote:
DEATH TO USB MIDI!!!
Quote:
I don't believe in null tests!
Quote:
The MPC1000 kept cutting off the beginning of my samples so I couldn't play back my laser kicks.
The guy is an infinite source of lulz. ...I just wish I could remember some more of his great wisdom.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #12
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golden beers's Avatar
Yea I know that guy derp . Classic quotes
Old 23rd February 2011
  #13
Lives for gear
 
nofi's Avatar
 

Quote:
I think its time the EMI&EMP section had one of these, what with the deluge of seriously quality quotes lately!
Old 23rd February 2011
  #14
Lives for gear
 
golden beers's Avatar
OP: is it ok with you if i start a Funny Quotes thread?

where we can post quotes that we just think are funny.


i was going to post a quote here that made me lol, but i didnt want to insult the guy by doing so.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #15
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msl's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by golden beers View Post
OP: is it ok with you if i start a Funny Quotes thread?

where we can post quotes that we just think are funny.


i was going to post a quote here that made me lol, but i didnt want to insult the guy by doing so.

Just quote it here or start another if you wish, if I could I would change the tittle to Funny instead.. I've put directions in the first post to delete the usernames when quoting...
Old 23rd February 2011
  #16
Lives for gear
 

One of my favorite "stupid quotes" was a comment posted on Youtube, and I have it in my sig here. It of course is in regards to the synths used in Van Halen's "Jump" and "1984".
Quote:
He did use the OBXa on Jump but I believe 1984 was a Roland JX3P.
Another one, which isn't stupid per se but an amusing Babelfish translation, is my sig line on VSE:
Quote:
Two VCO: thanks to the push rods, one can choose several forms of waves at the same time!
It's describing the waveform selection buttons on the Jupiter-6, that allow multiple waveforms to be selected at once.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #17
Lives for gear
 
syzygywell's Avatar
This one isn't from here but its still pretty bad. So I posted the sounds of Jupiter on my facebook page noting that I always knew the universe sounded like a synthesizer.



And an ex from many moons ago commented,

"Okay, it sounds like a synthesizer because they're using a synthesizer to record the vibrations and play it back!"
Old 23rd February 2011
  #18
Lives for gear
 

LOL ^ can't imagine why it didn't work out.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #19
Lives for gear
 
Simonator's Avatar
 

Quote:
In Which Ways Is A Jupiter 8 And A DBX Rack Loaded With 8 903 Compressors Similar??
This guy is a genius... And I am 95% of the users in this sub-forum
Old 23rd February 2011
  #20
Lives for gear
 
Simonator's Avatar
 

Quote:
I'm not going to lie and say I have a great life and drive a BMW M3...or,you don't know what you are talking about..... I admit it.... This is the reason I don't hang out with people much....I generally don't like people...and this is exactly why... Simonator is the exact reason why... I don't even know him in real life...maybe he's an awesome guy if you get to know him...personally I'm the most laid back person...I have no temper what-so-ever... I never yell.. how many men do you know like that? None... That's why I landed a total hottie girlfriend..... the only redeeming thing I had even done.... so I may be garbage...and poor, but I got a super hot chick at 20 years old.....that any guy would want. But that's all I got...didn't want anything more out of life.... Not ambitious....not a hard worker...a total bum otherwise....
Simonator is the exact reason why
Old 23rd February 2011
  #21
Lives for gear
 
msl's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Simonator View Post
This guy is a genius... And I am 95% of the users in this sub-forum

I remember that one, hilarious!


.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #22
Lives for gear
 
Simonator's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by msl View Post
I remember that one, hilarious!
Most of the best ones I can think of have either had the thread deleted, or the user was banned.
In some cases, I can find the banned user's profile... but it wont let me see their threads/posts.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #23
Lives for gear
 
Simonator's Avatar
 

Quote:
Personally, I don't like my productions to be too 'on the grid'... that's why I move EVERY element of my tracks back by exactly 219 ticks... It takes me nearly a day per track to do it, but it seems to just subconsciously give the track a really nice vibe, yet strangely everything still seems really tight.
Old 23rd February 2011
  #24
Lives for gear
 
datune's Avatar
Quote:
Originally Posted by Simonator View Post
Quote:
Personally, I don't like my productions to be too 'on the grid'... that's why I move EVERY element of my tracks back by exactly 219 ticks... It takes me nearly a day per track to do it, but it seems to just subconsciously give the track a really nice vibe, yet strangely everything still seems really tight.
LOL, that's hilarious!
Old 24th February 2011
  #25
Lives for gear
 
msl's Avatar


Btw for anyone who hasn't read it one of the funniest threads ever is the "stupidest things you have ever heard during a session" thread. Its over 100 pages and contains such gems as:

Quote:
I walked into a session and he tells me he has the perfect mix. Then goes on to say " look at the wave it's a perfect block, it doesn't get any better than that", and I'm standing there with my mouth wide open like wtf.....
Old 24th February 2011
  #26
Gear Head
 
samorost's Avatar
 

EDIT: whoops, msl beat me to it

There's a similar thread in another part of Gearslutz, over a hundred pages long!

http://www.gearslutz.com/board/so-mu...g+you+ve+heard

But to contribute to this thread, here's a good one:

A girl rock band at a rehearsal, the lead singer goes "The band is playing the song too slow. I need them to play at least one semitone faster!"

Last edited by samorost; 24th February 2011 at 04:23 AM.. Reason: posted too late :)
Old 24th February 2011
  #27
Gear addict
 
KRE8A's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Estin View Post
what about the infamous

"so you have two oscillators and you de-tune them, then what?"
o O ` Lol ..
Old 24th February 2011
  #28
Banned
 

Same guy I quoted earlier:
Quote:
The Akai ASQ-10 has a tight human feel.


Quote:
Skinny Puppy has ALWAYS recorded in a high-end studio! They would NEVER use something like a tape recorder!
Old 24th February 2011
  #29
Banned
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by samorost View Post
A girl rock band at a rehearsal, the lead singer goes "The band is playing the song too slow. I need them to play at least one semitone faster!"
Sounds like a line from Boogie Nights after Dirk Diggler horks down some coke: "Yeah, let's speed it up! ...by a couple octaves!"
Old 24th February 2011
  #30
Lives for gear
 
blinky909's Avatar
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Simonator View Post
these go to eleventy
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